So today we had a little visitor come to our house.
Let’s play the guessing game!
The guess who came to my house game!
Okay ready set go!
...
Okay, I guess it won’t really work as I had envisioned.
I guess I should just come out and tell you.
The cops.
The freaking cops came to my little quaint suburban house.
THE FREAKING COPS.
And do you know why the cops came to my house?
Because one of our freaking neighbors behind us called to complain about our barking dogs.
They didn’t leave us a warning note in our mailbox saying if we didn’t shut our freaking dogs up that they would call the cops- you know, like a three strikes thing,
They didn’t come over to meet us or make sure that it was in fact our dogs that were the ones barking (because- we literally have dogs on all sides of us except one),
but instead did a drive-by of our house to get our address and report us to freaking 911.
911!! That number gets called when there’s a fire or murder or no ice cream at Dairy Queen-
not when a dog is barking! Freaking call us- you know!?
What makes the whole thing even more irritating is that we literally are surrounded by people with dogs- barking dogs.
Okay- so I admit I have a freaking zoo at my house, but that doesn’t mean it’s our dogs and no one elses’.
The biggest issue is that Boz and Lucy are barkers- annoying piercing barkers. I don’t think they called on Rocky and Teddy. Rotts are traditionally not barkers (and in fact, I’ve never even heard Rocky bark-weird, right?), and Teddy barks but it’s nothing out of the ordinary and is only occasionally. Boz and Lucy, however, are the loudies. I’m pretty sure if someone called the cops on us- and took the time to drive by our house to get our address and ensure it was our dogs and no others it was because of Boz and Lucy and not Rocky and Teddy.
Boz and Lucy are our inside dogs, however, when we’re gone during the day we leave them in the garage, which is pretty much like leaving them outside in terms of noise carrying. We’re pretty sure that’s what sparked the call.
So- we’re not totally innocent and Will and I agree we have to do something with our stupid little barkers (ha ha, stupid little barkers. I’m going to be a great mom someday… so uplifting), but at the same time I am so enraged.
Yes!
Enraged!
I feel like our neighbors could have handled the situation better. I feel very angry with them for not going about the matter a little more neighborly. I told Will I wanted to go confront them on the matter- especially if it is one of the neighbors that has dogs that bark too. Will had to calm me down. I was seriously about to start knocking on doors like a crazy person tonight. Like a freaking lunatic cat woman- only with dogs…
hmm… it made sense in my mind.
Anyway- I just need to post because my blood pressure is sky high and I’m so so so so so (yes 5 sos!) angry at our neighbors and the fact that it’s the Christmas season and we live in a nice neighborhood and we are surrounded by barking dogs and we’re always friendly to others on our street and then have to have the freaking cops come to our house! What the hell happened to Good Tidings of Comfort and Joy!?! Apparently that’s gone out the window! Merry Christmas to you too you Scrooge neighbors! I bet you guys were the ones who voted against the home association pool too!
I know Boz and Lucy are yappy and annoying from time to time with the mailman comes or someone pulls into our driveway- and Will and I are going to have to fix that, but I simply needed to vent because I feel that their barking today did not warrant the cops coming to our house.
So you may disagree with me and think it was totally warranted, and that is probably because of your own personal experience with constantly loud dogs, but what really burns me is that ours are nothing of the sort. Boz and Lucy dogs bark, but like I said it’s when someone comes to the door or does something that you would expect a dog to respond to by barking.
...
This post was supposed to calm me down and make me feel a little more like a normal functional society member, however, the more I type the madder I get!
“Be a duck, Brittny.” (you know- let stuff roll off my back)
That’s what Will says, but I can’t. At least not tonight. I’m so fired up about what happened!
Sigh…
You think I’m crazy, don’t you?
You think I’m a crazy weirdo lady that has 50 million dogs in some sort of sketchy puppy mill sort of backyard set up that howl and bark and growl and grunt all day long.
I promise, I don’t.
I’m just really hot over what happened and needed to blow off some steam.
Only it’s not working
and I still feel like going across the street to talk to these people or creating a banner to hang on the front of the house that says something really tacky about how our neighbors have lice.. or gas… or both (heh heh, just kidding… kind of).
I guess I just need to let it go.
But I don’t want to.
(throwing a child-like fit)
Get yourself together woman! You’re talking ridiculous!
I know! I know!
I need to get my crap together… good tidings of comfort and joy, good tidings of comfort and joy…
okay, I feel a little more in the Christmas spirit.
I ought to go make them some christmas banana bread and be all sweet and kill them with kindness, right?
...
or I could just spike it with exlax and leave it on the doorstep.
Just kidding…
Exlax bread… we’re such great neighbors. Who wouldn’t want to live next to us?
All I can think is- the home association meeting next month sure will be fun. Lots and lots of fun.
I’ll bring the bread.
SERIOUSLY?
What did the cops SAY?
I mean...your neighbor can’t be that bright if they called 911!! 911?!! The cops have a PHONE NUMBER PEOPLE and someone could have NEEDED EMERGENCY SERVICES! And you were calling about DOGS!? The heck?
I hope you find out who it is. Then hit them.
No? Dangit, no one ever wants to hit people but me!