Literally.

Remember just this past week when I said that one of my resolutions was to put away laundry as soon as a load is done?

As you can see, I’m failing.

I will say, however, my dishes have not been left in the sink once this week! So- at least we’re halfway on our way to success.

Rome wasn’t built in a day.

But really, Brittny- putting laundry away isn’t that hard! Here’s to hoping I’m more successful this weekend. 

Here it is!

The fruit of our Will’s labor.

The man almost had a coronary, and we almost had to call our preacher for counseling- but it got hung (hanged actually- but who really says that?).

And I promised that I wouldn’t make him hang anything for at least another six months.

Something about how his blood pressure rises and how I’m not much help…

Anyway-

We hung this giant tapestry in my entry way last year, and now I have this one to accompany it!

I have two more, but I think we’ll wait a while before we undertake that project. It’s a necessary evil to make sure we stay married.

Back to work today.

Maybe I should buy a lotto ticket and stike it rich so I can retire early and pursue my lifelong dream building my own greenhouse and using my prize winning lillies to barter with my Amish neighbors for something they’ve whittled out of pine.

Or I could just go to this 10:00 meeting and look alive.

Do not be alarmed.

This is NOT going to become Brittny’s foodie/fitness blog.

Trust me.

As I mentioned, I’m healthy every single day of the work week, so aside from the weekend pain of not eating a pound of beef and an entire strawberry cake, I’ve pretty much got this thing down. However- I thought a good start to my laundry list would be to tell you guys what my plans are for the day!

Everyone lets out a resounding, “Yay!”

...

Or maybe not.

Anyhow, I’m off work today which is pretty exciting.

I started my morning off right with an egg on whole wheat toast. Chick-Fil-A is giving away their spicy chicken sandwich this week so I printed off my coupon and am going to sit with Will this morning while he eats his breakfast.

After that we’re going to see an early movie which will be fun. We’re going to see True Grit. You may remember it has a special place in my heart (ha). I figure if anything it will give me more material to bug Will with. I told him he should give me five bucks for every time they say “little sister.” I could be rich. 

I’ll have my carrots and hummus during the movie. Lunch is a taco salad with extra lean ground turkey, black beans, tomatoes, spinach, and a couple tablespoons of salsa. I made it yesterday and got everything all sectioned off and measured, since I’ll be having it a couple more times this week.

Later this afternoon I’ll have Greek yogurt.

Around the time I have my afternoon snack is the time that Will and I will have probably started arguing.

I believe I’ve mentioned that Will and I aren’t the best at home improvement projects. I don’t know what it is, but the second you get a hammer and nails out at our house it’s as if we rang the boxing bell to begin the brawl.

“In this corner, weighing (muffled by the microphone) and standing at 5 feet 6 inches tall put your hands together for B-Loooooooove!!”

“And in this corner, weighing whatever grown men weigh these days, and standing 5 feet 10 inches tall put your hands together for Misteeeeeeer B-Loooooove!”

And then the bell rings and Will and I knock our gloves together and go at it.

I even joked with Will yesterday about how we should start fighting (ie- hanging our picture) around 2:00.

I’m not sure he thought it was funny.

Maybe it won’t be so bad?

I mean, it has been a while since we’ve taken a major hanging project on. Maybe it will be easy and we’ll find a stud and everything will be even and perfect and thirty minutes later we’ll be sitting on the couch holding hands and complimenting each other’s picture framing abilities.

But I doubt it.

Way to be optimistic, right?

Eh…

I’m not sure what else is in store for us today. I know for dinner I’ll have tilapia with steamed carrots and then later tonight I’ll bake an apple with a little cinnamon and lemon juice.

I’m hoping to squeeze in a workout before dinner or right after. I usually go on the morning but my alarm failed me today so that didn’t happen. Today is an upper body day. I’ve posted my workout below. I superset so I’m constantly working a different muscle group without stopping. Once I hit all the areas I end the set with an ab and rest for a minute or so and start the next.

Yay for days off! Happy Monday to you!

More to come…

Today’s Workout
Chest
Bench Press
Inverted Row
Decline Barbell Press

Back
Bent Over Row
Pull Up
Row Machine

Shoulders
Bent Over Flyes
Barbell Shoulder Press
Front Raises/Flyes

Triceps
Skull Crushers
Cable Tricep Extension
One Arm Cable Tricep Extension

Biceps
Incline Curls
Hammer curls
Concentration Curl

Pushups

Abs
Plank
Elevated Plank
Side Plank
Bear Crawls
Cable Crunch

Hi!

Happy New Year!

Oh no, be warned- I’ve started this post with back to back exclamation points. I see more in the future of this post. Please do not let the cheeriness deter you. I will try to keep the exclamations to a minimum.

But I make no promises.

I hope you all had a great Christmas, and Saturday, and New Year’s Eve. The random Saturday insertion just seemed like the right thing to do… I have no idea why.

Our Christmas was good. We spent the morning with Will’s family and then travelled home late that afternoon. I took that following Monday off which was nice. We ended up going to the “big town” of El Reno, Oklahoma to eat at Sid’s diner. It was a place featured on Man Versus Food. The place was super tiny but the food was good, as we had expected. It was a nice day.

I had Friday off this week which was nice too. We spent a lot of the day shopping. How two people can spend a small fortune at Sam’s I will never know. We went to The Cheesecake Factory for dinner that night which was nice and spent the entire time reflecting on 2010 and talking about 2011. It was a good day!

Was all that boring?

Because I sort of feel like it was.

Sorry. The truth is- when Will and I were talking last night about some of the highlights of last year I couldn’t remember some of them and I realize I don’t really talk much about my life anymore here. Which is fine and what I have chosen to do, I suppose, but at the same time it’s sort of nice to be able to look back to my 2005 archives and actually recall a day after reading about it. So I was thinking that maybe once or twice a month I will try to capture more about what’s going on in my life. Mostly for me. I apologize in advance for the boringness.

Okay, enough about that.

Happy New Year!

Did I already say that?

Ah- yes. I did. And then went on and on about all! the! exclamation! points!

Are you a big resolution-er?

I’m not really per say. To a degree I suppose but nothing too extreme. Much like Angela , my goal is to never eat again or lose a million pounds. I never really take it seriously though. My other problem? I make about 15 of them and by mid January I’ve forgotten all of them!

“Wait- did I say I was NOT going to drink coffee and was going to drink more tequila?”

“Or was it not eating trans fats and drinking mroe coffee!?… Or was it tequila!? I know it that was in one of my resolutions somewhere...”

“This is so hard!”

I figure now that I’m another year older and wiser I should probably just suck it up and realize that I am going to have to eat. And losing a million pounds? Well that’s just silly, Brittny!

So this year is about sharing my goals and making them realistic. Also- not to make a dozen. Sure it’s nice to want to do things, I mean, I want to save the world! However, I realize I have to start somewhere. So that’s what I want to do.

Here goes.

1. Be a Failure

I want to fail in the gym this year.

Yes, you heard me right.

A big fat F.

For anyone that spends time in the weight room, you will know what I’m talking about. If you don’t- long story short is that in order to really see growth and really make progress you have to lift to failure which means you have to really exert and exhaust your muscles. I do that now… sort of… but I really take it easy on myself. I really want my time at the gym to be worthwhile, and it won’t be unless I put myself to the test mentally and physically.

My plan for meeting my resolution is to do it- to add the extra weight and document my progress. If I can only do four reps, well I can only do four reps. But with time it will grow to six and maybe even eight. Until I really start making things hard on myself, I won’t see the results I want to.

2. Be Squeaky Clean

The other day I was on the elliptical and a guy jumped on beside me and started working out. The second he walked past me, I gagged. No really- I did. And made a disgusting face.
,
The guy smelled as though he had sat in a 4x4 closet where 10 people crammed in there with him and smoked for eight hours straight. And then the 10 people left. But he decided to stay.So he could eat the cigarette butts.

No really- he did.

He ate them.

I’m pretty sure anyway…

As I continued on my second interval set I started to get mad.

Really guy!? Yeah- great plan. Go to the gym and work out but then go smoke six packs a day. That’s a way to be healthy!

How dumb.

I then spent my remaining 20 minutes on the elliptical gagging and turning my head away from The Ash Tray, thinking about how ridiculous this guy was.

I blame the high degree of my irritation on the workout. I think something about having my heart rate up and sweating tends to make me a little more intense than normal."Why bother showing up to the gym?! Your lungs are raisins.”

So as I started my cool down- and started to come back to earth- I realized it was wrong for me to feel the way I did. It’s that guy’s choice to smoke a carton a day. It’s on him. Granted, the second hand smoke is another issue- but let’s stay focused.

The second thing I started to think about was- “Wow pot! You’re calling the kettle black aren’t you!?”

Busted.

Guys- I live in a perpetual state of dissonance. I really do. I emphasize fitness so much in my life, and even go so far to say it’s my passion, yet not all of my lifestyle echos those words. I can go bust my tail at the gym and then go home and eat half a pizza and breadsticks.

And then complain about it for the next 2 hours.

But then repeat the same action the very next weekend.

My point is- I’ll never know how good I can be and what I’m capable of until I put.the.pizza.down!

Just put it down, Brittny.

Down.

I really love food.

I eat healthy just about every week day and then blow it on the weekend. Did I say blow it? What I mean is, calorically I eat enough for two people on the weekends. Maybe even three. Yikes! How awful is that to type!?

I decided that if I want to be my best and see what I’m capable of in the gym, which I claim is my passion, part of my success has to start in the kitchen!

So with all that being said my goal for this year is to eat a clean diet six days a week during 2011 and allow myself one “cheat” day. And when I say cheat day I don’t mean eating an entire box of cereal and washing it down with a double cheeseburger with fries. I mean eating things I enjoy but in much smaller portions.

Moderation Brittny!

So here’s how I plan on meeting this tough goal. I already made my menu for January and February because I know if I write it down and have a plan it will make it a lot easier on my life. I won’t have to spend time thinking about what I’m going to eat- because I’ll already know. This will be particularly handy when I’m start back to school this month.

3. Get Connected

I don’t think I ever told you guys about my funny story of the group we joined at church and then left. It’s too long to tell it here, but trust me, when Will tells the story it has people in tears. Pretty funny.

Anyway, we’re not connected in any sort of small Bible study group and we really need to be. Church is good but it’s also important to be around people our age and have that small group interaction, you know? We’ve become sort of discouraged by our journey in this area, so my hope is that this year we will find a group and get connected.

4. Do well in school.

My plan? Is to just freaking do it, darn it! To read, pay attention, and stay on top of stuff.

5. Be a Better Wife, Friend, and Employee

This girl right here can tell you I’m not always the best at keeping up with communcation. She and Retired Blogger Sarah will have exchanged about five emails to my one sometimes! Granted, there’s going to be times where life is busy, but friends are important and I need to remember that. I have lots of “friends” but very few real true friends and they’re very precious to me and I want them to know that by my actions.

I also want to be the wife to Will that I need to be. We’re a solid team, but I think after almost seven years of marriage (! when did that happen!?) we’ve sort of gotten comfortable with each other and have settled into our life. That’s good and all, but this year I wanted to be mindful of being “nice” and “thoughtful” and more of a “girlfriend” to Will (I have no idea why I put all that in quotations).

You think I’m crazy right?

Trust me, it all makes sense in my head.

Anyway- I went into my calendar and put random things on random days as reminders to do something nice for Will. I know it seems pathetic that I actually have to remind myself to do thoughtful things for Will or surprise him with something, but hey- I’m trying and this is a good way to make sure I’m staying on target!

6. Put it Away: The 2011 Laundry List

I really want to put my laundry away immediately after doing a load. I also don’t want to leave dishes in the sink. I’m pretty sure this is a resolution for me every.single.year. And every.single.year. I don’t follow through. Sure, I do for a few weeks- but before I know it I look at the chest in our bedroom and see a laundry pile the size of a small SUV stacked high. I don’t know why. I also don’t know how two people can generate so much laundry. But it happens. So, let’s hope I actually keep the pile manageable this year. I have a load sitting in there right now- which means I need to get off this computer and start folding! Hey-Rome wasn’t built in a day. I’m on it!

So there you have it. My goals for 2011. Knowing I have an action plan and a goal and am drawing a line in the sand by telling you guys, my friends, makes it seem more real.

Here’s to a solid 2011 for all of us.

I’m sitting here watching Will down a giant glass of egg nog and am shaking my head.

The stuff is so thick that you practically need a spoon to get it out of the carton. I feel as though it would be much better frozen. At least it would be the right consistency. When it’s a liquid, is it a drink or a meal? It’s so confusing! 

If we’re going to be, or stay, friends there are a few things you probably need to know upfront.

1. If you give me a gift, and it’s in a pretty bag, there’s a good chance I’m going to keep it and use it the next time I have to give someone a gift. Yes, I’m a bag recycler. I said it.

2. I can’t go shopping with anyone besides P. Ever. I can have good intentions and really try to shop with friends but I just can’t and I end up wandering aimlessly, totally surrendering to the fact that I will not find something. I have no idea why.

3. I’m pretty sure I have a small degree of ODC. I am always afraid of leaving my straightener plugged in all day so I have to check, and recheck about three times before I can finally walk out the door. If it’s going to be a really long day away from the house, I’ve also been known to take a picture of the outlet to reassure myself that I really did unplug it and will not burn the house down.

Wow.

Pretty sure I divulged just a tad too much there.I’m confident you all think I’m crazy now. Or even crazier?

Moving on…

4. If we ever went on a road trip and we made the joint (AWFUL) decision that I would be the one to drive I would likely definitely get us lost. I’m one of the most spatially challenged people I know. It’s a talent, really. In my defense- unless the sun is rising or setting how in the WORLD are you able to know the cardinal directions!? I mean if it’s high noon and the sun is shining brightly in the “middle” of the sky are you freaking telling me that if I’m stranded in a jungle I’m going to know I’m headed due north!? I think not. Geez. Thankfully, there’s an app for everything.

5. I honestly do not think any dessert could ever be “too rich” and it annoys me when people say it. I’ve finally had to come to grips with the fact that the annoyance is me, because, after all, there are probably desserts that are “too rich.” However, it hasn’t deterred me from rolling my eyes anytime I hear someone say it as we stand over an office birthday cake.

That’s it for now. Happy Monday!

Ooh - wait can I add a freebie number six? It annoys me when people say “Happy Monday!” yet it doesn’t annoy me enough not to do it myself. Because I do. All cheery. And annoying. Such a contradiction.

More to come.

Wishing you and your family a day full of happy memories, wonderful surprises, warmth, and blessings. I’m so thankful to have you all in my life and appreciate the friendships that have been forged as a result of this blog-o-sphere.

Merry Christmas and I can’t wait to catch up on what everyone did, as well as share a little about my day too.

Love,

Will, Brittny, Boz, Lucy, Rocky, & Teddy
(So many doggies! We’re on our way to an 8-man football team.)

Actually said to me today, “I can’t wait for you to get fat!”

Girls are so nice, right?

Done with school!

Well- for a few weeks anyway.

My final was on the brutal side. What the hell is ANOVA and why don’t I remember reading about it during the last 8 weeks!?

Geez.

It feels good to have my first semester under my belt. Now I can focus on Christmas week.

Any cleaning my house.

It’s the messiest place on earth. I need someone to put me on that Clean House Showa pit.

Anyway- now that I’m done and have a few weeks off I can focus on cleaning and the important stuff like reading all the Women’s Health magazines I’ve been putting off for the last four months.

It’s the big things that count, really.

Okay- enough complaining about my messy house. Trust me, I’ve been doing enough. In fact, Will looked at me yesterday and was like- “You’re done with school. Sit down. Breathe. Take a couple of days off before you jump into boiling the house. And seriously, seriously please stop complaining about how messy it is.”

I get it. I’m annoying. I told him I’d keep it to a minimum.

So let’s move on and let me share with you how CRAZY Oklahomans are during the holiday season.

I don’t know if any of you have been to Oklahoma, or know any Oklahomans, or have some sort of stereotype in your mind about what people from Oklahoma are like (um- and if you’re using me as a comparison method and the word “goofy” or “awkward” keep coming to mind?… well please disregard)

Anyway, I like to think that as a whole, Oklahomans are nice people.

Sorry- let’s say that correctly. Everyone, get a slight southern drawl ready, and here we go-

Oklahomans are Naaaiiiccce.

There. Much better.

Well, it’s not true.

At least during the holidays, that is.

Will and I had to go to the mall Saturday.

A quick trip to the mall.

Because we needed two gift cards- and nothing else.

However, we should have known that at this time of the year there is no “quick trip to the mall.”

You may have intentions for a quick trip, but there is nothing quick about the experience at all.

Virtually every other Oklahoman had the same plan.

A quick trip to the mall.

Oh- and before we go any further.

Who doesn’t have their Christmas shopping done by now!? GEEZ. Seriously.

Okay, granted Will and I had to grab one thing, which is probably what everyone else out and about today was doing, but still- Saturday’s experience alone is enough to remind me that any amount of shopping the week before Christmas is a bad idea.

A.Bad.Idea.

And I hardly ever do it. Except, the girl who was going to get our boss’ gift had to leave town unexpectedly which meant I had to go to the mall to secure the gift.

And yes, I say “secure the gift” in a Jack Bauer sort of fashion, because it truly was some sort of operative mission involving stealth and skill and the ability to have no Christmas heart- even if it means taking out an old lady clad in a cute fuzzy Christmas tree sweater, equipped with holiday lights and bells.

You just have to do it. It’s Christmas. The season of joy and giving stealing parking spots and fighting over the last hideous pair of fuzzy Christmas socks for Aunt Margaret.

Speaking of stealing parking spots- I totally fell victim to a terrible little Christmas hater Saturday. The mall was fuller than a kid who downed a whole plate of oreo truffles and butter cake. We were driving around, circling, circling… much like sharks around a wounded seal.

As soon as a spot opened up- BAMO- it was taken.

Well I dropped Will off to start shopping while I tried to find a place to park and came upon the best.spot.ever. It’s almost as if it was golden and beaming and surrounded by a beautiful virginal choir clad in white robes singing and rejoicing, welcoming me into their space.

Except- as I began to make my turn into the spot a mini van-

That’s right- a VAN

A small little van full of a little soccer mom and her snotty kids and their Capri Suns and raisins and Christmas sweaters-

flew out of nowhere and descended right into my spot!

I was flabbergasted.

I was angry.

I laid on the horn.

I felt slightly better.

Do you not believe in Christmas joy you soccer mom Scrooge!?!

Granted, I’m sure she needed the spot more than I did- but I didn’t care.

It was the Saturday before Christmas. At the mall. It was war.

Except I couldn’t really wage war since I needed to continue on my hunt for a viable parking spot. Even if it meant parking on grass. Across the street. In a sketchy apartment complex.

Whatever it takes, darn it.

I needed to make that purchase and nothing was going to get in my way. Not even a Honda van.

I finally found a parking spot and fought my way through the army of Christmas resistance Christmas cheer.

First stop? JC Penneys for Will’s grandma.

I walked in and was greeted by a smiley young and pretty employee handing out candy canes and wishing everyone a Merry Christmas.

Which made me breathe a little easier and loosened up my tense shoulders.

Ha.

It’s as if they knew that for 30 seconds I was going to forget about the hell that was the mall parking lot so that I would enter their store and stay.

Only to be confronted with the SAME parking lot hell machines only this time instead of being in the form of cars it was in the form of patrons!

That’s right!

Patrons!!!!

They’re so mean and competitive! Yes- it’s like a whole “sport.” Them against me. “Five yard penalty for cutting the person in line.”

“Unsportsman-like conduct on the receiving team!”

It was like a losing battle the whole time. Does anyone win the weekend before Christmas? Are the sales worth it? Can your blood pressure handle it?

Because I’m pretty sure mine couldn’t.

I crumbled like a week old cookie= “Go ahead, push me around. Go ahead take my spot! Hey- have my first born while you’re at it!”

That’s my passive aggressiveness showing itself.

What makes me laugh is that these same “patrons” that stole my spot and pushed and nudged me around all huffy and rudely are the same friendly faces you and I know and love and buy presents for!

It’s crazy!

What gets into us!?

It’s like all our tact goes right out the window.

It’s brutal.

It’s painful.

It’s not festive at all.

And thinking about the whole experience annoys me all over again. Rude Honda van spot stealer!!

...

I get it.

Much like the messy house complaining, I need to lay off the crazy Christmas shopper complaining too.

Merry merry Christmas- and I mean that in the most non-Oklahoma mall shopper way possible.

Hey what about you guys? I gotta believe it’s not just Oklahomans that morph into courtesy killers. What kind of Christmas shopping annoyances have you experienced this season?

More to come! Hey- I’m out of school for a while. Do I see more consistent posting in my future?!