I literally sat in dog puke for an hour last night.

It was only when I got up and Will looked at the couch and said, “I think a dog threw up a little on the couch!” that I realized that a dog had in fact thrown up.

And I had sat in it.

For at least an hour.

And had no clue.

It’s been one of those days all week…

(and I’m done with my class next week which means I owe you a really big giant update)

I woke to Boz violently gagging at 1:42 a.m. this morning.

Turns out the kid had barfed everywhere.

Oh sorry- not everywhere. That would imply that there was no place for me to step, or that I needed a fire hose to adequately clean my house.

That was not the case.

He did, however, puke six different times, in six different places.

That was fun.

Especially in the middle of the night.

It was like an early Easter egg hunt.

Only there was most definitely no chocolate bunny at the end of the trail.

Happy Friday! 

Good: It was icy today so I worked from home.

Bad: I ate pizza for lunch (um a LOT) and cereal for dinner and totally de-railed today’s goal. I really need structure in my life, as you can see.

Good: I left a piece of cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory in the fridge all.week.long

Bad: In a moment of weakness this past weekend I ripped it out of the fridge and devoured it like a starving panther in heat.

Let’s not lose sight of the fact that I waited a WEEK to do that though, right? I consider this a small success.

Good: I got a super cute new pair of boots during Christmas.

Bad:It is far too cold to wear them with a pretty skirt and show them off. Pants for now…

Good: Will bought several new shirts and they’re so pretty (ahem- I mean manly) and I always feel happy when he wears them

Bad: They suck to iron.

Good: I found some super cute stuff online at New York & Co and was going to use a gift card I had gotten at Christmas to pay for everything.

Bad: The stupid site will only allow me to apply one gift card and so they keep wanting me to put $75 on against my credit card instead of using another gift card. Seriously people! It’s 2011! Figure a way for me to apply both.

Good: I worked out today- which wasn’t a planned workout day.

Bad: See above for what I ate today.

Good: I’m logging my calories on Lose It with my sister

Bad: I’m now friends with Angela so she knows I went way, way over my calories today.

Good: My doggies snuggled with me on the couch while I worked today.

Bad: Boz woke me up at 2:30 this morning puking. That was fun. I cleaned the carpet with very limited light so I wouldn’t wake Will and went back to bed. When I woke up this morning I saw that Boz had barfed three other places- luckily on the tile.

Good: It’s almost Friday

Bad: Let’s not end on a bad note- it’s almost Friday after all! 

Wishing you and your family a day full of happy memories, wonderful surprises, warmth, and blessings. I’m so thankful to have you all in my life and appreciate the friendships that have been forged as a result of this blog-o-sphere.

Merry Christmas and I can’t wait to catch up on what everyone did, as well as share a little about my day too.

Love,

Will, Brittny, Boz, Lucy, Rocky, & Teddy
(So many doggies! We’re on our way to an 8-man football team.)

Will and I recently went out of town and boarded the doggies at a new vet clinic.
 
We opted to use this new place because we hate the other clinic in town because they are more exclusive about the dogs they board and it’s mainly just a thing they do on the side for a small group of people. We figured this would be good for the babies, all 4 of them, to ensure they got proper care and hopefully had somewhat of a better experience than at the previous kennel where there’s a million barking dogs and hissing cats around the clock.

Plus, who doesnt like to be part of an “elite” group?

Yes I realize we are talking about my dogs but I’ll take what I can get.
 
We tested the waters a couple of months ago by boarding Rocky and Teddy there while Will and I took a trip to Branson with his family. It worked out seemingly great and there were no issues. In fact, it seemed like they really liked Rocky and Teddy. What’s not to love right!?
 
Well, this past time we ended up having to board all 4, which was a first. Boz and Lucy don’t do very well away from home. They’re annoying spoiled companion dogs and will let you know it by barking all.the.time. They’re the dogs you love to hate.
 
Or  maybe they’re the dogs you hate to love.
 
Ha- who am I kidding. They’re annoying. I know it. But they’re just so darn cute!
 
Do THESE dogs look like they’re spoiled bark-y terrors? I think not!
 

 
Anyway- let’s get back to the matter at hand. When the Littles start barking it becomes a whole fiasco.
 
Then Teddy gets started.
 
And then it’s pretty much a deafening symphonic of various barking ranges the entire time we’re away.
 
Or so we’ve been told.
 
I think they’re lying.
 
But that’s because I’m in denial.
 
We went to pick all of them up the other day and the lady seemed quiet frazzled. Which made me laugh considering I knew it was because of Boz and Lucy. Tiny little teacups that weigh less than a bag of sugar. How much havoc could they wreak!? Are you telling me that YOU, a grown adult couldn’t control two Coke cans? Heh heh. Weak.
 
We got the dogs and she had nice things to say about Rocky and Teddy, as usual, but for some reason she had nothing to say at all about the Littles. I can’t imagine why (ha).
 
As we paid, Will looked our chart that was near him and noticed it said the following, “Dogs very bark-y. Not sure if this is going to work.”
 
So yeah, we’re pretty much blacklisted from this new place, largely in part to our tiny terrors.
 
So much for that. We might as well take a huge black Sharpee and X ourselves off their list of boarders.
 
Because I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what the old lady did as we walked out that day. Right after she opened up her bottom drawer, pulled the shiny flask out, and chugged the whole thing. Our dogs seem to have that affect on vet clinics.
 
All I know is that with dogs like these, we’re going to be excellent parents one day.
 

I locked myself out of the house this afternoon.

But wait- there’s more.

There’s always more.

I keep waiting for a time in which my bad fortune no longer follows me, however that time has yet to come and once again reared its ugly head in the form of a locked door today.

Let’s get started.

Okay. So today is Will’s birthday. Yay for Will’s birthday!

I was determined to make today great.

Which was my first mistake.

I should know by now that if I’m out to make a day great something is lurking around the corner to squash my plans.

Will I ever learn?

Work was really busy all morning and I really needed to work through lunch, however I thought it might be a good idea to run home today, check on the doggies, and grab a quick lunch- which is what I did.

As I finished my lunch I noticed it was raining pouring outside. I thought I better get an umbrella to take with me to avoid the downpour, only I realized my umbrella was in my car- and Will had my car today.

Aha! I remembered I had a random umbrella out in the garage. So- barefoot and all I ran out to the garage (closing the door behind me, of course) and grabbed the umbrella. As I went to enter the house it happened.

The door wouldn’t open.

I then began to feel a little panicky, sick to my stomach and started experincing that yucky upper lip sweat.

I pryed and jolted and yelled (you know- because yelling always unlocks bolted doors) but nothing happened.

I then got the genius idea to use a screwdriver to leverage the door between the frame.

Um, the terrible dig marks in the door frame clearly yell, “That wasn’t a good idea you freaking moron!!!”

Yeah- so don’t do that.

So then I began to get totally irrational and ridiculous. Like a mad woman. “I know, I’ll run and thrust my body against the door to force it open!”

Okay- so I didn’t really do that, but trust me- I was quite irrational nonetheless.

So… what to do, what to do…

I had a pair of nasty old tennis shoes and a pair of tacky black cheap-o flip flops.

Choices, choices.

I lifted the garage, opened my umbrella and started knocking on doors up and down my street.

In the rain.

The pouring rain.

In a pretty white dress.

A pretty white dress.

In tacky black cheap-o flip flops (I figured that went better with my dress… in that trashy sort or, “I like to dress up but have no regard for what I wear on my feet” sort of way).

No one answered.

Why would they? They were al at work- where I needed to be.

Up and down the street. Finally! Someone answered. This woman across the street had just had a baby and was home- thank God for your baby woman! It was if God allowed you to have your kid so you would be home at this exact.moment.in.time.

Okay- so maybe not, but it did feel a little like a divine moment after trudging up and down my neighborhood in the pouring rain, pretty white dress, and tacky flip flops.

Anyway- she was gracious enough to let me in and use the phone. I called Will- who was not in town today (of course!). He told me to call a locksmith and work it out that way.

Oh- and he was annoyed that I managed to lock myself out.

Happy birthday honey!

Anyway, the lady told me that she could just go ahead and take me back to work so that I wouldn’t have to wait for a locksmith and pay for him to come out. I thought it was so nice of her to offer. I have very nice neighbors. I graciously accepted, took my tacky flip flops, got in her car and went back to work.

As we rode back I realized that there were a few bad things I had failed to think through when deciding not to call the locksmith.

1. My purse was in the truck, totally exposed for all the world to see and steal.

Genius Brittny.

Will tells me time after time, “Brittny- bring your purse inside and don’t leave it in the car!” And for once in my life he was so very right (actually, he’s always right about this one...). My freaking locked house was beyond safe at this point. I could most certainly confirm all doors were locked! Sigh…

Then there were the doggies.

The doggies stay in a kennel all day long because you may remember they’re quite naughty and cannot be trusted to roam around the house all alone.

Just recall this post or this one or this one.

Good times.

Anyway- they’re bad doggies and cannot be trusted.

And I had left them in the house.

All alone.

Home alone doggies.

To roam free.

And chew my wood.

And the shoes I was wearing as of 11:30 this morning and should have been wearing as I was riding to work.

I could just imagine what was happening to my house.

What a mistake to leave them out!

Sigh…

Will loved finding that out.

Oh- and I didn’t tell him. I just let him come home and be surprised.

Surprise! Happy birthday!

Anyway… it’s been quite a day.

Will picked me up from work and I felt back because I had to have him drive me to get his cake oh- and I had intended to get his birthday card on the way home too. Opps.

So- there you have it.

There’s probably a ton more I’m leaving our and need to share but Will wants me to watch “Dating in the Dark” tonight because this guy on his favorite sports talk radio was talking about how funny it was.

I think it’s weird.

But hey- it’s his birthday, and I did leave our kids home alone today.

Oh- and locked myself out.

Let’s not forget that one.

Genius. 

It’s only Monday and my brain seems to be enjoying its three day weekend early.

I honestly feel like a restless fifth grader during the last week of school. I’m finding it so hard to concentrate and stay on track. All I can think about is swimming this weekend and being lazy and fireworks and fun (um and loads of terrible food- followed by the gym of course… perhaps...).

I think the dog days of summer have hit me hard. Our neighborhood is full of kids and I secretly envy them everyday I get home from my work, clad in my dress clothes and clunky purse. I’m fully convinced our school system sets us up to drag during this time of the year as professional adults. I mean- you get three whole months off your entire life and then all of a sudden- BAM- the no fun zone. The occasional single day off observed on Memorial Day, 4th of July, and Labor Day.

Um- yes, I’m whining- but I secretly think you agree.

Or at least I like to think so.

I’ve been humming, “School’s Out for Summer” all day today- and it’s killing me slowly.

I think I like Monday holidays better than Friday holidays. I think I stay on track better. I have no idea why- so let’s not camp out here.

I have a few pictures to share with you guys I’ll have to post soon, and a short little video of our little Patriot babies! Our groomer always dresses the dogs up in the cutest little bandannas for each season. Right now they’re all red, white, and blue- it’s so cute. I’ve been calling them all sorts of random made up Patriotic names, big long ones that annoy Will. Like, Little Lucy Martha Washington or General Bosworth John Hancock. I’m loving it. Will isn’t. But I secretly think he does.

But I’m probably wrong.

I usually am about those sorts of things.

You would think his annoyance would prompt me to stop- but it only spurs me on. You’re so lucky you don’t live with me. I would most certainly drive you crazy. There are times in which I think Will is on the edge- but I think that’s why God gave me someone so freakishly strong and stubborn. Nothing is going to drive this man crazy, not even me.

So what are you guys doing for the 4th? Are you taking time off this week? Going out of town? Hanging out with lots of friends? Guys- all this talk is making me want to start our weekend of festivities early! Let’s have a potluck at my place this Thursday? Yay for cook outs with friends! Um- only we still don’t have a grill (depressing, I know) and the George Foreman? Frankly. It sucks. I should reserve this frustration for its own post.

However- I will sarcastically say, “Clean up is SO easy!” HA. have you ever tried to clean that thing? You literally need a freaking car sponge followed by a brillo pad, acid, and holy water.

But I digress.

So, perhaps the cookout won’t work as easily at my place-unless you want to load up your grill and come over? If you’re lucky I might even get all wild and crazy on you guys and breakout the sparklers!

I know- I’m out of control!

Sigh… it’s only Monday night and sadly I have several long and busy days ahead of me.

Here’s to happy thoughts of swimming, (finally) getting tan, eating, friends, fun, and freedom.

Happy Short Week!

1. The weekend wasn’t as bad as anticipated.

2. Pictures are posted and I think they turned out pretty good. I think Will needs to wear a tux everyday.

3. I never became more aware of the fact that Will and I truly and seriously treat our dogs like real life children more than I did this weekend. I listened to all our family members with kids and the little common trigger phrases they said and thought to myself, “Wow… I say that too. To my dogs. I think Will and I need help.”

4. I actually thought about kids this weekend (as in maybe having them one day down the road) and sort of freaked out but sort of did not. Long story short- I saw a lot of couples this weekend with small kids that seemed miserable (not with their children, but with their spouse) and it freaked me out. At the same time I thought about how I also know a lot of people that seem even happier with their spouse. I guess some of that could have been because of the circumstance (um I’m pretty sure traveling and having to stay up late for a family dinner can make EVERYONE grumpy). What do you think?

5. I honestly wore more makeup than the bride this weekend and felt a little ridiculous. She’s very simple and I so should have remembered that. Eh- I don’t get to dress up much so I figured I might as well do it right.

6. The AC in our truck went out. Thankfully it went out on the way home and not on the way there. I’m certain Will and I would have ended up in marital counseling had it gone out before. Have I mentioned I turn into a raging psychopath when I get hot? Probably not.

7. I felt really old Sunday when I went to bed at around 8:30.

8. I like Will’s family- despite what I say on my website sometimes. I’m pretty lucky to have his family in my life. I could definitely have worse- and realized that this weekend.

9. I didn’t even get to dance with Will at the reception. :( Do you know the last time we danced was back in 2002 when we met in ballroom dancing class!? I thought I was getting a dancer, but um- notsomuch. The 3 or 4 times they had a slow song Will was helping to get the bride’s overnight bag into Dr. Vet’s car, or tagging the car, or something else. Will and I were going to dance to the last slow song they played, but Dr. Vet and Mrs. Dr. Vet snatched us up and we danced with them instead. Oh well. Hopefully someone else will get married soon?

10. I’m beyond behind on reading and commenting on your blogs. Therefore I’m turning off comments today until I catch up. Sorry I’m a sucky blog friend but I promise to catch up soon. 

A nearby community is holding their annual Woofstock event this weekend, and I’ve literally been excited for weeks.

Weeks.

Poor Will has had to hear me drone on and on about Woofstock this and that and how much fun it will be and “maybe we’ll meet some nice people.”

Only there is an underlying predicament which needs to be addressed:

Which dog(s) are we bringing to Woofstock?

Yes- it has become a “predicament.”

Sad, I know.

It’s like being Charlie from Willy Wonka and having a bright shiny golden ticket into a whole new world of amazement and perfection and dog utopia- but can only bring one dog.

What a toughie!

I would say we’d bring all 4- but are you kidding me!? Not only would Wil and I end up in marriage counseling from all the, “You’re letting the dogs walk YOU! Get ahold of them, Britter! How did you manage to let go of the leash!? Teddy has officially taken out the Woofie Snack Table!”

It would go something like that= and that’s just the way WE would behave. That doesn’t even count the way the dogs would behave.There’s just no way we could bring all four. It would be pandemonium and we would most certainly end up blacklisted from any furture Woof event.

So- I’m leaning towards taking one Big and one Little.

But who!?

Lucy would represent the “Littles,” but I’m not sure who will represent the Bigs.

Rocky is by far our best behaved dog. He is so loving and wants to please you and is very obedient. However, I’m apprehensive to bring him because of the fact that he’s so freaking gigantic and I don’t want to overload him with a million dogs to play with. He’d be hard to keep on a tight leash because he’s so strong- and although obedient, I know he would want to go play with the other dogs.

Teddy, however, is WAY terrible. We call her Marley because she’s so hyper and has been difficult to train. She’s most definitely our most beautiful dog, however, she’s just so darn hyper and jumpy that I know she would maul everyone in sight with her excited-ness.

It appears as though I’m analyzing my dogs for you guys:

a. Like they’re children

b. Like you freaking care

Trust me- I realize that both are ridiculous.

So- I’m leaning towards me carrying Lucy in a carrier while Will keeps Rocky on a leash- because he’s way more capable of maintaining a leash than I am.

Wow.

Listen to me.

I make fun of people like me.

Weeks, guys, weeks! That’s how long I’ve been talking about this weekend.

About an event- for dogs!

I seriously need to get out more.

Although I’m beginning to realize how ridiculous I sound about my Woofstock zealousness, I will most certainly post pictures for you all to share in our fun.

<3

This weekend was lovely. It was simple and nothing extravagant, it was just nice.

Friday night was very uneventful. I made a pork loin and mashed potatoes for dinner and we watched our FRIENDS boxset. I was asleep on the couch before 10. I’m so fun.

We went to IHOP for breakfast yesterday. I love the place and Will isn’t the biggest fan- which to me is a big way to show love. In these economic times taking me to IHOP is like buying me a tennis bracelet… or something like that.

I love breakfast.

After breakfast I went to the gym to undo some of the pancakes.

It didn’t work.

We hung around the house, got around, and went to Zios for lunch! I ate bad. Really bad. Then we went to see Dave Ramsey. I really enjoyed hearing the things he had to say. I’ve always been interested by him, so it was really good to hear him speak. His thoughts are very enlightening and practical. Things you know about but don’t put into action or use the tools to put together. He’s speaking for the next two weeks and Will and I have decided to go back to hear what else he has to say.

Our evening concluded with taking care of the doggies and making a trip for ice cream.

You know- to round the whole awful night of carnage out on a good note.

Today was nice. Since we went to service last night, we got to sleep in today. It was wonderful. In fact, I haven’t brushed my hair (um-or teeth. Yuck!) all day.

I made us breakfast and we lounged around and were very lazy!

Will and I took the “Bigs” on a walk around the neighborhood, and as always, they were highly um- “spirited-” and took me on a walk. I had to switch off mid trip and walk Rocky instead of Teddy. Although Rocky weighs a million pounds, he’s a lot more subdued than Teddy most of the time.

We came back to the house and watched the bracket b-ball “thing” (ha ha I’m so technical). We ate dinner and then decided to take the “Littles” on a walk too. Only- they don’t walk. We do the walking and hold them close. I’m sure it’s annoying to watch, but we don’t mind. They’re sort of spoiled.

We spent a lot of time talking all day today. Talking about the things we learned about the night before, talking about how we need to set goals, what those goals were, what potential timelines were… it was really nice. It’s been a long time since Will and I have talked like that- probably since Kuwait! It was nice. It made me feel close to Will, and reminded me that we’re a team and need to set some goals we can attain. I think going to see Dave Ramsey was really good for us and I look forward to next week.

It’s simple weekends like this that make me thankful for the things I have- and also wishing a little for a three day weekend.

I normally don’t post “what I did” entries, but for some reason I wanted to round out the “Will and Brittny” week with a bit of a recap.

It just seems right.

More to come.