Remember the old days of Sesame Street? There used to be this game where kids would have to pick which item was not like all the other items. Ha- I can still remember the silly song!

One of these things is not like the other,
One of these things just doesn’t belong,
Can you find which thing is not like the other,
By the time I finish my song?

Yes, I agree that it’s sad that I still remember this song. However, you might understand why I’m reminded of it when you see this picture:

If you guessed that the Cocoa Pebbles don’t belong, you’re right.

Guess who they belong too?

Hint- If you guessed, me, Boz, or Lucy you’re incorrect.

Oh, and if you’re wondering why in the WORLD I have an entire cabinet devoted to South Beach and Kashi items, it’s because they don’t sell a lot here so I order them online. Plus, Will got me several boxes when he was home a few weeks ago.

While I was poking around our cabinets I just had to take a picture of this (it’s too funny):

Let’s analyze!

I know the picture cuts off some of the box, but you’re able to see all you need to:

Get Happy Inside.

Can I simply say eating All Bran Bran Buds will NOT make you happy inside?

In fact, you will be so UNHAPPY and miserable inside that you will wish a UFO will land on the Earth and slimy green aliens will take over your body so that they will feel bloated,miserable, and 5 times their weight instead.

Did you know a serving of that stuff is like .33 of a cup? Uh- raise your hands if you eat .33 of a cup of cereal!

If you raised your hand- you’re lying. Who eats a little over a quarter cup of cereal?

NO ONE!

So- if you eat .33 of a cup of this stuff, I’m sure you will be happy inside. I think a serving has 55% of your fiber requirements. Pretty good.

However- for the normal population of people that live and function in the world- we all eat at least half a freaking cup of cereal each morning. I’ll go even further to say that most of us eat 3/4 to 1 cup of cereal a day.

That means we’re eating about 233.234% more fiber than the average requirement.

Trust me your body will NOT be happy inside.

Also- you see how it says “You’re In Control!” All pretty and yellow?

Just FYI- you’re NOT.

You’re SO not.

Did you notice that it also mentions a “Feeling of Lightness?”

AHAHAHAHAHA

Um- not so much.

One bowl of that stuff and you feel like a bloated hot air balloon carrying a freaking Peterbuilt Semi in the basket.

Ha. Lightness. That’s so funny.

These freaking cereals need to come with a warning.

Something like:

Warning! Consuming More Than a Serving of this Cereal Will Cause:

Lots and lots of Wet Wipes.

Ha Ha, just kidding.

(not really)

I just got the most random email from my mother-in-law.

If you’ve read my blog for a long time you already know about her.

If you’re just joining, I’ll sum it up by saying she’s a lot like Amy’s mother in Everybody Loves Raymond. A whole lot like her. I swear she is daily escorted to Heaven on her lunch hour so that she can meet with God and assess the world’s events.

“Jenny, I’m thinking about making it rain in Djibouti. What do you think?” God asks.

Of course, my MIL concurs- afterall, it’s GOD!

Hmm, I wonder if they eat cucumber and feta salads? I bet they’re amazing.

Anyway, my MIL “guides” people a lot. She would never flat out say she thinks a person needs to do something, she will simply “guide” them, or say she “thinks” a person should do something a certain way.

I haven’t gotten an email from her in months (we talk on the phone once a week instead-YAY! ha ha). Then today I randomly get one a short one that says the expected, “It was so nice to have Will visit, etc.” However, 85% of this short letter was about how it’s so great Will has lost weight and she “hopes” (one of those guiding words) that he continues to lose weight because of the family history of diabetes, etc. She continues on with the little nudges saying, “It’s so important for Will to get the weight off now before any problems develop.”

I know with all my heart my sweet dear MIL means well with this letter. I truly know that.

However, I guess I’m just a little annoyed that it’s been months since we’ve emailed and the entire email I get is about Will’s fatness and need to lose weight.

Hmm

Maybe I should back track a little, because you’re probably reading this and thinking, “Grow up! It wasn’t that bad!”

and you’re right,

however, this issue has been ongoing thing with her.

Everytime we get together she “guides” me to cook healthier, not go out to eat as much, etc. I even got a Cooking Light subscription for my birthday (which by the way- I LOVE). I feel like she has blamed me for Will’s weight gain- which quite honestly is HILARIOUS because if you looked in our cupboards you might honestly go blind by all the healthy foods.

Yes. Blind.

I’m always in a bad mood when I’m at home and really needing something terribly inappropriate to eat- because we don’t have anything! Not one freaking ounce of chocolate, cookies (well, except south beach ones), or chips. I bought chocolate chips for the first time in ages last week.

Yep. I made Will gain weight. Uh huh. I forced lettuce wraps and pita sandwiches down his throat until he couldn’t hold anymore. I’d wait an hour so his stomach would settle and move on to round two, all the way until he was about to throw up. It was like a game we played.

Seriously! I really think she must think I have cupboards stacked full of vanilla frosting and teddy grahams, and that we eat frito chili pie for dinner each night.

I can’t control what Will eats outside of our house, but I can assure you that what he eats at home is healthy.

AND

(yes- AND)

Will has been doing AMAZING lately. I’ve never been prouder. I’ve been packing his lunch and he’s just gotten so disciplined. I think my MIL sees the weekend/vacationing side of us- which unfortuntely is quite different from our normal side.

But seriously- we can’t be blamed! They don’t have Taco Bueno in Kuwait! We HAVE to load up. It’s our duty!

Will is a grown man capable of making decisions on his own. It’s not my job to mother him and make him do things he doesn’t feel like doing. He already knows the risks of diabetes and that it runs in his family. He doesn’t need me constantly reminding him. It was Will finally making the decision on his own to get healthy, and I can assure you if it were me pestering him and nagging him about it it just would have driven him further away.

I really feel like going to the store and buying loads of corned beef, Costco sized bags of cheese, frozen pizzas, cheetos, gallon sized tubs of pudding, and a big fat fry daddy. Then, I want to strategically place them all over my kitchen and invite my MIL all the way from Oklahoma to our house for dinner one night.

Just for laughs.

She’d probably mutter (in her head, of course! Never out loud- remember? She eats lunch with God), “I knew it! I knew she was feeding Will to death!”

Ah, you gotta love spite (just kidding...kind of).

So that is today’s story.

Hmm, all of a sudden I’m really craving a big gooey chocolate-frosted brownie.

<3

Only in Kuwait (well maybe not only-Amsterdam definitely has us beat) could a person walk into a pharmacy,

request sleeping pills,

muscle relaxers,

five boxes of Sudafed,

antibiotics,

anti-depressants,

stimulants,

laxatives,

and birth control

and not be put in some database and monitored.

Seriously.

You can get just about any prescription drug you want, all for less than a Venti Mocha Iced Latte.

Want to know how I know this?

Well, remember when I had my jaw troubles a few weeks ago? I ended up seeing a dentist. He gave me all sorts of crazy advice. I cried my eyes out and had a “woe is me” pity party and finally decided to call my dentist back home. He recommended I take a good muscle relaxer and some sort of anti-inflammatory and offered to fax the prescription to a pharmacy. I told him thanks and “now I see why I pay you and arm and a leg” and decided to try to get the recommended medications on my own without having to hassle with faxing stuff.

Lo and behold! I went to the pharmacy and got them without a hitch. No prescription needed. I’ve been told dozens of times how easy it is to get stuff over the counter here, but now I believe it.

So kissing scenes are cut out in public movie theatres, alcohol is banned, and co-ed parties are outlawed, but darn it! you have access to a plethora of prescription drugs that can be abused.

Such oddities here I tell you.

<3

Private to C-Bear- You left a comment on my blog!? Can I simply shout jubulations!?! You have NO FREAKING idea how much seeing that made my day. I felt so loved. Glad you survived the earthquake. I would have been really heart broken if the Earth had eaten you for breakfast.

So I’m pretty much a freaking idiot moron.

I’m busy as CRAP and am taking time to post. Hmmm…

Anyway-

I should be sitting at an emergency dental clinic right now, but instead I’m harnassed to a crappy desk chair pumping Red Bull through an IV to keep me going.

I’m totally shaking right now. Maybe I should lower the dosage.

I think I’m way too committed to my job.

Seriously.

I know I’ve mentioned it before, but I have TMJ. I’ve had it for a few years now. The last few weeks, though, it’s gotten bad. Today, however, was the worst. I was on my way to work and yawned- and got stuck. I was totally freaking out! I had to carefully move my jaw closed. It totally sucked. Then it felt all out of place and “grindy.” It felt wrong. I can barely open my mouth right now. Yeah- I’m real effective today. Did I mention I also had to lead a freaking meeting? I was like Monotone Girl today.

I think that should have been my cue to get in the car and go to the freaking dentist.

Ha- why would I do that when I can bask in the 126 degree heat and receive 142 emails today all about different “HOT” items that

MUST

BE

DONE

YESTERDAY!

AGHAHAH!!!

Anyway, who can resist that, right!? So I came in anyway.

I did, however, make an appointment for tomorrow night. The thought of going to a dentist in Kuwait makes me want to cry, but the lady I spoke with informed me this dentist was trained in America. In fact, when I called to make the appointment I taIked directly to him. His English is amazing. It made me feel a lot better. I wish I could fast forward time because quite honestly, I’m going to become immune to Aleve and Red Bull if it doesn’t come soon. I might have the shakes for the next 3 weeks.

I also had a mega huge coffee as lunch.

Can I just say liquid diets SUCK? Please, God, please allow me to eat! Man cannot live on liquid alone.

So, say a prayer for me. I need it. I hope the dentist is like, “hey! you’re just in time! We just invented a miracle pill that will make it all better in 3 minutes!”

I can wish, right?

Until then, Monotone Lady is heading back to her pile of work.

More to come…

I’m so mad right now! I just spent an hour posting my workout and finding examples of execution on the internet just to lose it all!

Two times in one week.

What bad luck. You’ve got to be freaking kidding me. It took me forever to find this stuff. I’m just going to go ahead and post it anyway. If you have questions I’ve got some good sites you can check out. I was so proud of this stupid post. Ha- that’s probably why I lost it.

This is the program I was doing up until this week. If you want my new one let me know and I’ll post that too. The new one has a lot of nautilis machines. So far I’m really like it too, but not as much as this one. I think free weights are amazing. Most of this workout is either done with free weights or a cable machine. I don’t claim to be an exercise genius, so please don’t knock my routine. This program has done great things for me. Remember to make your muscles work. You don’t want it to be easy. You also want to keep good form.

I used to do this three a times a week but it got way too time consuming so I would do the entire thing twice a week, splitting up the program into different days.

Legs
With all of these I’d do a set of 20 and increase my weight and do a set of 15. As I progressed with this program I’d increase my weight even more and only do a set of 12 on the second set.

Cable Squats
Cable Side Leg Lifts
Wide Stance Squat (with a dumbell)
Cable Leg Kickback
Single Leg Calf Raises (with a dumbell)

Chest
I’d do a set of 15, increase my weight and do a set of 12. As I progressed with this program I increased my weight even more and just did 9 on the second set.

Bench Press w/dumbells
Bench Flies w/dumbells
Chinning (this is done on a chin-dip machine. I’m not even sure this is the correct name of the exercise. It’s just what my trainer lady calls it. this exercise works the biceps too.)

Back
I’d do a set of 15, increase my weight and do a set of 12 or 9 depending on how heavy the weight was. With the Hyperextension I’d do two sets of 20.

One Arm Row (this is done with a dumbell)
Reverse Chinning
Hyperextension (this is done on this thing) It’s sort of like a backwards sit up. Freaking! See!? This is why my lost post was so important. Anyway, I’d do this one holding a weight.

Shoulders
One set of 15, I’d increase my weight and do a set of 12 or 9 depending on how heavy it was.

Upright Row
Alternate Front Raises

Biceps
One set of 15, I’d increase weight and I’d do a set of 12. As I progressed with this program I increased my weight even more and just did 9 on the second set.

Alternate Bicep Curl
Hammer Curl

Triceps
Same reps as above

One Arm Kickback
Tricep Dips (this is done on the chinning machine)

Abs
Declined Sit-ups w/weights
Reverse Crunches
Cable Crunches (this one is great!)

So that’s it. Sorry it wasn’t more detailed, but as you can imagine I was sick of looking up examples after the first time. Like I said, if you want the other one let me know. I have an elliptical at home, so I use that during the week too (not as often as I need to though). I do it twice a week- shut up! I know that’s not enough and I don’t need you telling me! Ever since Will’s been working out he’s become the “workout expert” (<- that topic is a post all on its own) and tells me all the time.

wow! I actually feel like I posted something worthwhile today. What a weird feeling. Don’t get accustomed to it.

Huh… I feel a little guilty posting this after eating half a pizza last night. Not to mention the fact that we’ll be eating something incredibly inappropriate for Will’s birthday. Plus cake. Oh well. One thing that comforts me is that muscle burns way more calories than fat.

More to come…

I’ve unofficially declared Tuesdays (or Mondays, or Saturdays or any freaking day of the week when I’m all dried up and out of any real substance to talk about. heh- who am I kidding? When do I ever have real substance on here?) Update Day. Because, well, as you all know I have so much exciting and fresh information to discuss about my thrilling life in Kuwait (ha).

Something Actually Worth Reading...well...sort of
I was so excited to hear that one of places Will and I are visiting this year was named one of the new 7 Wonders of the World! I was already excited to go, but now? Now I’m just plain stupid about it. If you were too freaking lazy to click on the link for the grand revealing (don’t worry, I’m lazy too and rarely click on links), I’ll go ahead and tell you what new Wonder we’ll be visiting this year. We’re going to Petra, Jordan!

Will and I decided we really need to make the most of our time here and start planning the trips we’ve been talking about forever but just haven’t done because “we still have 103 more years in Kuwait.” However, we’ve already been here 2 (which is hard to believe!), so before we know it, it will be time to go home and we will have missed out on things we wanted to do. So, we committed to taking a few short trips during the rest of our time here. We invited my family along, so it should be a good trip. We’re going to stay on the Dead Sea a few nights, see Petra, go to Amman- it should be a good trip! I’m most looking forward to Petra, though. Mainly from an eschatological aspect (wow! you didn’t know I was a smartie, did you?). Will, however, is looking forward to swimming in the Dead Sea. I hear it’s physically impossible to swim in it because of the salt content- so watching him attempt to swim will be quite a show.

I have quite possibly the craziest story ever in all the world (okay, that’s a total flat out life) about planning our trip, but sadly, I can’t share. You can thank the Kuwaiti people that monitor the web for trigger words that I can’t even write in this post. Let’s just say it has to do with Jordan’s neighboring country- a place most Arab countries believe does not exist. Ha ha- or as my friend Sarah says, “the Whole-y Land.” Was that a good hint? I freaking hope so. Anyway, we had a creepy experience last weekend because of it and found out that the Ministry flags and blocks all calls to “that country.” Maybe one day I’ll get to tell you about it. Since I just taunted you with half a story and got you all like, “What the crap is she talking about!?!” I’ll go ahead and move on to something else. Sorry for the ambiguity.

Not Exactly Worth Reading
Other than the Jordan trip (which seems forever away), there just doesn’t seem to be a lot going on.

Last Tuesday afternoon I got an email from the wife of the couple we went out with (hmm, did that sentence make sense?.. who knows...). She asked us out on

The
Longest
Date
Ever.

It’s this 6 hour tour thing. It sounds like a lot of fun (ha- Will was thrilled), and I was actually looking forward to it until Will mentioned, “Uh- we couldn’t even carry on a conversation for an hour. how are we going to manage 6!?!” He’s right. This reality has set me into a panic. I think the couple might be just as frantic because I haven’t heard from her since the initial email. She told me she would find out the times and then get back to me. Granted, it’s only Tuesday, but now I’m wondering if they want to “forget” that we had made plans. I guess I’ll find out soon enough. I’m sure 6 hours will produce a plethora of blogging material. I’ll keep you guys posted on what will either be the 6 Hour Stand Up or the 6 Hours of Continual Conversation… or lack thereof.

Are you Still Reading!?
Last Thursday I went to Will’s camp to work out with the guy that is whipping my Will into shape! It was a lot of fun...well..fun might not be the right word. I was glad to get to see Will in action and see all the “abuse” Will says this guy puts him through. The guy was really great and helped me make some improvements to my own program. That’s not exactly how I would like to spend every Thursday, but it was nice to work out together and finally get to meet the guy that has helped Will drop almost 10 pounds.

We bought $80 worth of grapefruit last weekend. Yep, we love our citrus. I think we looked like complete morons checking out. I should also mention that we went to 3 different grocery stores this weekend too. Yeah, that was loads of fun. Every store has something the other ones don’t. It’s quite a headache. So, Will and I decided we would limit our grocery needs to 2 stores and just load up on things we need from the 3rd. That’s exactly what we did. Will loves these Del Monte jars of pre-cut grapefruit. We took all that was available and proudly walked out with 2 (extrememly heavy) bags. Isn’t that sad!? $80 and 2 bags? For freaking grapefruit!?! Gotta love the prices they slap on imported goods.

Hmm… Want to see the most beautiful hospital? Go here. It’s the newest and best women’s hospital in Kuwait. It’s like a freaking hotel. My mom had her surgery there. Surprisingly, it’s cheaper than most “normal” hospitals in the states. I have no idea why I just linked you there… probably because I need to make a doctor’s appointment and wanted you to know we actually have normal hospitals here and not something from behind a farm shed. Uh, well, we have those too- but at least we have options, right!? Sigh, sadly I still don’t think you guys are any more eager to move here.

What else?… I started re-reading the book of Daniel last week. I forgot how much I really enjoy that book. I’m only like 5 chapters in, but I feel so refreshed by the things I’m encountering. I just want to sit and continuing reading on and on. Here’s just a few things I’ve tried to focus on from my readings (in normal people’s language):

God wants us to give all of ourselves to him, even in things that seem sort of trivial.
Just because the “in crowd” is doing something doesn’t mean it will make you better in the long run
God stands tall with those who are faced with adversity
Pride comes before the fall, and God alone is sovereign. <- that's what I read about today- King "Nebby's" prideful heart.

I'm reading the book along with a Prophecy commentary I got for my birthday. It's really enriched what I'm reading. Also, Beth Moore has an excellent study on Daniel, but it's better to do with a women's Bible study group, so I think I'll hold off on that one.

Go Ahead and Leave, It’s Pretty Much Downhill From Here
Boz has started doing the weirdest thing! He pees directly into his food dish after he eats. “What in the freaking crap are you thinking!?!” I constantly yell. He just cocks his head and looks at me and is all, “What, woman?! It’s MINE! ALL MINE!!” MUHAHAHAHAHA.”

This marking his territory crap makes no sense to me. I guess I’ll just at least be thankful men aren’t allowed to walk around doing the same. Think about all the wars that would break out over that!

Alright, alright. I think I’ve put you through enough crazy ramblings for one day. I wish you all a wonderful day!

More to come <3

There’s nothing like a good old LOOONG life update about every facet of one’s life, right? Yes, every facet- including the kitchen sink.  I figured it was time for me to write about some of the things going on in my life. Not just for something to occupy my time, but mainly so 30 years from now I can look back and say things like, “Oh yeeeaaaah. That’s right! I remember now,” and, “Wow, I sure did say ‘freaking’ a lot!”

Let’s get freaking started!

I miss P.

A lot.

She’s totally living some awesome summer life right now, and I’m so very proud and excited for her- but I still miss her. If you’re just joining me, my sister P was chosen to serve as a Congressional page this month. It’s a really big deal and I’m so excited for her opportunity- but I still miss her (btw- Hi Nicole! I hope you got my letter.)!

Apparently her roommate’s mom is a representative, so the two of them have been chosen to do a few extra things here and there (ie: my sister is getting preferential treatment. I’m okay with that.), which has made her time that much more interesting. Not only that, but my parents signed a waiver for her to stay off campus on the weekends, so she goes and stays with her roommate’s family. How much fun!?

They work them like Iditarod sled dogs (or so she says), so she hasn’t had time to talk. I did get a text message from her this week, though. It made my day. We texted back and forth for a little while, but she had to go to sleep. I have some juicy gossip about Miss P (it’s boy related), but I better honor my sister code.

Speaking of- her boyfriend Z wrote the sweetest letter to me about her yesterday! It was about how he just needed to tell someone he missed her, and how he can’t wait to see her and how he wishes she could text more. Ugh, it hurt my heart! I texted her on the way to work this morning to tell her that Z loves her tons. See, P has been battling what to do about Z. He’s going to college in England this summer, and well, I’m sure we’ve all been in a similar situation during our teen years.

Wow- what a ramble about P! Sorry guys! I guess you get the point that I miss her!

*****

I ran into our date’s mom yesterday. It was funny. She’s a rather blunt lady. She told me how her daughter said they had a good time with us and would have to get together again sometime. Then she immediately followed with, “I hear you guys have two dogs that keep you busy.”

“Yes, we do! Yes, they sure do keep us busy.”

“Yeah, well my daughter isn’t much of a dog person...” She then went off on a story about how they had a family dog and the daughter rarely touched it, etc.

I just kind of nervously laughed and said, “Okay. Good to know if we ever have them over.”

Ha ha, how funny. So, I’m not sure how to take that. I wonder if the couple looked at each other with big bug eyes and in a terrified whisper said, “They’re dog people.” ha ha

The daughter (hmm, we have to give her a code name...) did email me this week about getting together again, so that’s a good thing, right?

*****

I like the new Maroon 5 song, but I don’t know the words to the chorus except, “I don’t believe it’s true, anymore, anymo-or-or-ore,” so I sing that part over and over until the end of the chorus. Oh- and I also know the “So this is goodbye” part. That’s about it. If you rode in the car with me, you really might consider ear plugs.

*****

I worked out at my camp’s gym this week. I figured it would be good for me to walk on the treadmill three times a week there, and then go to my gym and do the weights. By the way, it really REALLY sucks trying to work out during a lunch hour (I think I’ll post about that next week). I try so hard not to break a sweat (which is virtually impossible because, like Sarah R, I’m a “sweater").

Today, however, I’m going to sweat to my little heart’s content because I’m taking my lunch at the end of the day. I’m going to run on the treadmill 40 minutes there, go home, and do 30 more minutes of cardio and then lift weights. I’ve decided I need to be lifting heavier weights. I lift heavier than all the other women at my gym (ha, mainly because they’re not lifting much at all- just like 5 pounds most of the time). I have it in my mind that 15 reps is better than 12 or 9 or even less because it’s a higher number, but I know that’s not always true. I have to get that out of my head and be willing to increase my lifting weight and decrease the reps. So, that’s the challenge to myself today. If you’re twitching by what I just said, don’t worry, I won’t “bulk.” A lot of women I’ve talked to about weight training freak out when I say the word “heavy weights” because they’re afraid of bulking up. Rest assure, we don’t have enough testosterone in our bodies to do that. It’s nearly impossible to look manly without using some type of steroid. So- heavier weights does not equal big bulk. That’s my PSA for the day.

Did I tell you Will is kicking butt working out right now!?! I’m so proud of him. You might remember that his dad has diabetes and heart disease, and I’ve been concerned a long time now about Will. Well, there is this trainer that he works with that has been dying to get his hands on Will. This trainer guy is awesome (I wish I could hire him!). He helped this one lady in the military lose 40 pounds in just a crazy amount of time. He is a major butt kicker. Will agreed to give this guy his lunch hour to help him lose weight and get in shape, and he’s done a great job (this guy is doing this all for free too) Will lost a little over 5 pounds the first week! I was so excited for him. He would totally kill me if he knew I was typing about this to the world, but I just can’t help but feel so proud of his diligence to break the cycle of diabetes. Okay- I’ll get off this subject. Like I said- he would freak if he knew I was writing about it.

*****

My summer swap partner Heather got her gifts this week! I was so very excited to hear that!

Sorry, Jenny, I have to cheat and post this a day earlier! I won’t be able to post tomorrow, so I thought I’d slip it out a day early. Sorry for the leak! It’s me.

She emailed me yesterday to tell me she got it. I won’t tell you guys any more, though. Promise. I look forward to getting my package soon too! I’ll be sure to post as soon as it comes in.

*****

My good friends Sarah L., Theresa, and I have come up with a way to get to know each other better than we do now (because- it can be hard to stay close in freaking Kuwait!). Sarah came up with a Question of the Day in which we each take a turn asking the others a question about themselves that normally wouldn’t come up in our normal conversation. I’ve had a lot of fun getting to know my friends better.

Today it was my turn to think of a question for the girls. I wanted to post it because maybe you guys have something to add too, and I thought it’d be interesting to hear what you have to say. Ever since Mrs. BFW’s post about the things she wants to do before she turns 30, I’ve been thinking about the same thing! So, I asked the girls:

- Do you have a list?
-If you do, what are 5 things on that list? If you don’t, what are 5 things that would be on the list?

I’ll go ahead and share what I wrote to them:

No, I do not have a list, but below are 5 things that would be on the list:

1.Change a life/lives with the gifts God has given me. I know this sounds ambiguous and HUGE, but I’ve made it my prayer to live my life in terms of eternity and not just the here and now. Besides, it would be all about God and not me so I know it’s possible.
2. Have and maintain 21.5% body fat (I’m at 26% now. 4.5% more to go. Ugh)
3. Go on a Mediterranean cruise.
4. Play the cello again.
5. Sing- somewhere, anywhere. It’s my biggest fear. Perhaps you two will get me wound up and karaoke with me this December? Ummm.- nah. I think I’ll put this one off a few more years- for all our sakes.

So those are a few things I shared that would be on my list. If you feel like it- feel free to share yours. Heck- maybe I’ll come up with a long list of my own after reading your guys’!

*****

I’m addicted to Wheat Thins. Note- they’re not healthy if I eat an entire box in a day and a half!

*****

The weekend looks to be “good.” I know good is a boring word, but well, good is how our weekend will be. I have a hair appointment tomorrow morning, so there goes half the day. They take a long time at my salon. It’d be okay if I could sit around and talk to my stylist like we’re best friends, but the ladies don’t talk at my place. Boo.

Afterwards I’m not really sure what we’ll do. I think at some point tomorrow we’re going out with my parents for father’s day, so that should be fun. Will and I actually got invited to a social function this weekend too! However,my sweet husband tends to be a stick in the mud at times. He didn’t want to go. I’m a little disappointed. Why can’t we just show up for 15 minutes and say hello on our way to dinner, you know? Well, one valid reason is because they live almost half an hour away. That’s really the only one though. Sigh, I just had to vent a little!

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It’s hot.

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Wow. If you’re still reading, kudos. I wish you a bright and sunnny day! I’m so glad we have this little community of friends. <3

I’m off to enjoy the weekend!

PS- I almost forgot! I’ve had a couple people ask me how to leave comments on my blog. You simply click “Share the Love” and it will bring you to the comment box!

I’m officially turning off comments for today’s post. When I do that it means one of three things:

1. The post is Freaking-A boring and I don’t want anyone to feel obligated to try their hardest, straining a butt muscle because of the effort, in order to produce some sort of feedback they don’t really want to write in the first place but feel totally obligated because I told them how much I totally love their blog and that they’re my blog idol, oh and PS- you’re shoes are totally cute I wish I could dress like you (ha ha, what a run-on sentence!). I mean seriously- who really cares what I had for lunch or the fact that Kuwait is changing their weekend??

2. I’m behind on my own obligatory feedback

3. I really don’t want to know what you have to say. I’d rather live in my ivory tower and not know that you totally hate me, disagree, think I need to be checked into the Betty Ford clinic, or any other tidbit I think you might want to share.

Today comments are off because of reason # 3. I’m going to appear judgemental and shallow and mostly just need to get this all out for therapy. I don’t need anyone telling me what I already know!

I’m totally feeling frustrated.

It’s sort of for a dumb reason, yet I continue to let the whole thing bother me.

By the way- when I tell you why, you’re going to think i’m a freaking idiot.

Here’s why.

Apparently the whole world (yes- the WHOLE world, even the Pope and the weird lady that lives down the street from you) is getting plastic freaking surgery.

Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a little. It’s probably only something like 97.4% of the world, but I swear, that 2.6% is not from Kuwait. Everyone I work with is getting something done right now. Three different people walked into my office today to tell me what they had done, are getting done, want done, want their cat to have done, and even what they want done to their 97 year old grandmother. Then the gossiping begins- which means I then get to hear who else has had, wanted, or is getting something done. The numbers are staggering. I’m not sure if it’s because people have less expenses out here and have the extra money around to do it, or what, but I feel like this small minority of people that have yet to have a 80 foot long garden hose shoved up my stomach to suck out the fat!

Do you think I’m crazy yet?

I know this sounds so dumb (hence why I turned off comments!), but I just feel frustrated about the whole thing. I go to the gym 3 times a freaking week, work my butt off, pass on crappy foods (uh, well most days), try my hardest to take care of myself, floss (that’s right! I freaking even floss for crying out loud!), and yet so many other people simply go into a clinic, go to sleep for 5 hours and come out looking totally hot and thin without breaking a sweat.

**Caution, Pity Party to Ensue**

It’s just not fair!! Harumph.

Yeah, yeah, I know what you want to say, “Why do you even care what other people are doing?! That’s so dumb. Just focus on you and don’t worry about other people.” I know all that crap already. The truth is, I don’t know why I’ve let it get to me so much. Perhaps it’s because seriously (really- no lie) there are several, several, several, people I know over here that have gotten work done. I’m constantly being surrounded by it, hearing about it, learning about it.

It’s not that I feel bad about myself- although, I did stare at my boobs for days on end after one of my friends got implants. Poor Will he had to field more questions about my body the past month than ever before. Of course, husbands are always the worst people to ask because they know what we want to hear. “No, sweetie, I think Pamela Anderson’s boobs are disgusting!” Yeah, Will, I’m so sure.

I guess it’s more that I feel discouraged. I think about how much work I put into health and how easy it could be to simply pay someone to take care of it for good. I think about all the ladies I work out with at the gym and how I know a lot of them have gotten things done (they even wear those tight girdle things to work out in post-lipo. It’s creepy), and for some reason I let it annoy me. They look freaking amazing because of all this money they’ve poured into themselves, and I’m sitting here letting Will have at my blackheads while I contemplate how I’m going to get rid of the hail storm on my butt. Hmm, quite a different picture.

So, what is real beauty?

Now when I look at people here, I wonder if that’s really them. Does that make sense? Maybe not…

I sit here day in and day out hearing all these stories, and begin to think, “Wow.. maybe I need to have something fixed too...” It’s pathetic. I’m not saying I would get something done, I’m just saying after listening to all these men and women talk about flaws and how they’ve had theirs perfected now it makes me feel sort of raw.

I know in my heart that “Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting,” and “Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart,” but by golly tell the rest of the world that! We place so much emphasis on outward beauty to the point of inflicting pain on ourselves through plastic surgery, and it’s sad. As a Christian, I will openly tell you I struggle daily with focusing on having a beautiful heart instead of the perfect outfit. It’s such a fallacy so many of us struggle with, and sadly, I feel like it’s begun to consume my thoughts lately. Like I said, I’ve heard about it daily for the last few months. That doesn’t help either! I guess this should be something I pray about more often!

Hmmm, maybe I should throw in a disclaimer now that I’m almost done with this post. I’m not saying plastic surgery is bad. I don’t mean that at all. I know there are people that have to get it done for medical reasons, etc. I’m not posting about that today- I’m posting out of my own selfish frustrations about the people around me that are bombarding me with their information. Nothing else. Please know that. Heck, my mother is in the hospital as we speak because she got work done! Hopefully you get what I’m trying to say. It’s just about how it’s been at the forefront of my life lately.

So, I want to write a dozen more paragraphs, but I think I’ve embarrassed myself enough. Afterall, I do still want you to read my blog.

Tonight after work I’ll go the the gym like I always do, sweat like a man, and then go visit my mom in the hospital- once again to think, “Hey- maybe I need that done too.”

Until then- cheers to the fat girls.

Love your fellow chubby normal looking friend,

B-Love

I went and got my measurements taken Thursday.

I have mixed feelings about the whole thing because I didn’t feel like the nurse really took ample time to do everything. I was in there (and I’m not joking- I looked at my phone) a little longer than 4 minutes.

I just don’t know how accurate you can be in that amount of time!

She quickly pretended to take my blood pressure. She weighed me. She quickly measured me. Then she took my body fat percentage as if Grey’s Anatomy was on commercial break and she might fall into a coma if she didn’t make it back in time.

So- I just don’t feel confident in the measurements.

Now, now- I know what you’re thinking-

(in a mocking voice), “Wah, wah, wah, poor Brittny didn’t get the results she wanted so now she’s going to cry!”

Yeah, yeah, yeah- whatever. The truth is that in some weird way I was excited about this measurement because I could physically see results, and I feel a little cheated because of the rush.

I lost a few pounds and dropped my body fat another 3%. I have to say, I’m sorely disappointed with this figure. I want to go back and get it done again- with the nurse actually taking time to acknowledge what she’s doing instead of having the phone glued to her ear, speaking Hindi to her overly obsessive boyfriend.

Probably about how she wants to watch Grey’s Anatomy but can’t because some fat blonde is in the room.

Anyway, 3% is a big disappointment for me. I was really hoping to get it down more. Did I tell you that the first time I got it taken she told me she’s never seen someone thin be so fat? ha ha, okay- not in so many words, but that was the jist. Anyway, since it was so high before, I really wanted to get it down more. I feel like I’ve been working so hard only to have my hopes dashed! I lost 3% the first 3 months I was working out. This time it’s taken me 5 1/2 months to do it.

Sadly, despite Toothpick Thin Nurse Woman’s rushing, I think the body fat test was probably pretty accurate.

I know this because I’m sitting here typing about fitness and eating an embarrassingly large piece of Baskin Robbins ice cream cake.

So large that you would be ashamed of me.

See, our office is a little chaotic, so while the thought of doing birthdays for everyone is nice- it just doesn’t happen. We scheduled a little party today only to have a whopping 5 people (including me!) show up. So, my coworker and I thought it only fair that since we planned the whole thing and bought the cake, everyone was getting screwed on their piece but us.

And they did.

And we didn’t.

And I’m sick to my stomach now because it was that freaking big.

Anyway- back to exercising…

That, my friends, is why it was only 3%. It’s not all about what I do in the gym, it’s what I do out of it. That is where my problem usually lies.

So, I feel a little disappointed about the measurements, but now I’ve set a reasonable goal for myself. I want to lower it another 2% by the end of the summer. I’m just going to have to get really disciplined about not just weights, but mostly cardio. That’s where I lack- cardio and my weekend eating habits.

That’s how it all went down. No need to get a second opinion (not like there is one to get in this country!). I’m still a little soft, but hopefully I’ll reach my 2% goal and go from there.

18% will be here on no time!

Well… maybe not- gotta go- my cake is melting and, well, we both know where the priority lies.

Have I ever told you guys how convenient it is to live in Kuwait? In fact, it’s too convenient.

Every place you can think of will deliver food to your house-

Chilis, Ruby Tuesday, Pastamania, Burger King, McDonalds (yeah- even fast food is faster)- you get the picture.

Heck, there are these little convenience stores in every neighborhod and you can tell them you need a bottle of water, 3 candy bars, and a box of tampons and they’ll deliver it to your door.

Life is too convenient here.

Do you want to know how I know that?

Last night I passed by a Subway that had, in big bold yellow letters, “We Deliver!!”

Does anyone see the irony in that?

Sort of defeats the purpose of an active lifestyle if you can sit on the couch watching The Biggese Loser, use your feet to cusp the phone off the coffee table and onto the couch, press speed dial, and order a 6 inch tukey- no cheese and fat free ranch, all without expending a single freaking calorie.