Hi!

So it’s somewhat late, I’ve had a long day, and I’m sleepy (read: boring). However, I wanted my first “real” post in half a year to be a little different so I made a few boring videos!

My face is hilarious in this one.

And because I feel really bad for being such a terrible blogger and friend I wanted to embarrass myself as a peace offering. Please excuse the fly-aways, sausage fingers, and giant zit.

Hi guys.

Guys?

Guy?

Anyone?

Probably not- not that I would blame you. At all. At all times a million.

The answer to your question is- I have no idea why.

The other answer is yes, I am going to post soon. A real one. Because I’m a “blogger” and that’s what bloggers do. Even if they don’t blog for oh- like four months.

Yikes.

We’ll talk about all that later.

Not that there’s much to discuss really.

But I do feel like we should talk anyway.

About anything.

And everything.

Welcome back, Brittny. You’re home again.

More to come (soon)…

Yes, I was there.

We drove down to Dallas Friday afternoon to cheer on the Sooners- and subsequently watched them lose on Saturday. Sure, I could talk offense with you, or Sam Bradford, but really? Why waste a good internet space?

My point exactly.

Perhaps the biggest travesty is the fact that I didn’t even get a fried snickers out of the whole ordeal. I seriously anticipate those things like a junior high boy encountering his first set of junior high girl lips.

Seriously. I LOVE. LOVE. LOVE those things.

And once a freaking year I get the opportunity to have them. And I missed it this year. All because I didn’t get one before the game and we darted out of there after the stupid Sooner loss. Can I blame this on them?

Let’s.

So can we just move on? I had this whole cutesy post in my mind about Rivalry Week, but with the loss (and lack of fried snickers) I think it’s best to tuck it away for next year.

Assuming we win.

Moving on.

If I recall correctly I promised you guys a B-Love moment, yes?

So last Friday the group I work directly with went out to lunch. In addition to “the group,” the vice president of our section as well as the director, program manager, and my boss accompanied us. So, although it was a casual lunch there are still certain things that just aren’t appropriate to discuss over grilled fish with the VP, you know?

To set it up, to the left of me is my coworker that I work most closely with. Directly in front of me is our director- and on one side of him is the VP, and on the other is the program manager.

So everyone is talking, no big deal, and somehow the conversation goes to dancing. Who knows how, and really it’s irrelevant. It gets mentioned that none of us (the girls at the table- one being my boss and the other being the person sitting right next to me) danced at the Christmas party last year. My boss and coworker friend quickly remind everyone at the table that they did in fact dance at the Christmas party.

I, however, did not.

See, I have very strict rules about dancing. Rules perhaps I will share with you all in another post. Rules that include never, ever dancing at work functions.

I live by these rules and they cannot be broken.

Anyway- it is because of these rules I did not dance at the Christmas party.

That and no other reason.

“Brittny, didn’t dance,” someone said.

And then all of a sudden, with no lag in response time, with no thought of the implications of the reaction, my coworker spewed, “That’s because Brittny was drunk.”

Silence.

Mortification.

Awkwardness.

Laughter.

Hello VP of my office, director, and BOSS! Your apparent alcoholic employee will be tipping back a flask of tequila in the bathroom now.

My face got so hot and I literally started to sweat. I looked over at her and she looked at me and immediately said, “I’m so sorry! I have no idea why I just said that!”

And then for the rest of lunch that was all that was discussed.

Nice.

For the record?

So not drunk at the Christmas party. Sure I had some wine, but I was no where near inebriation. More like what I like to consider as “Brittny Plus.” But I mean the more you’re at the table swearing you weren’t drunk, the more people think that you were, you know?

”Sure we believe you. You weren’t drunk. Riiight.”

Ugh.

After the awkward laughter, and “I’m so sorrys” from my coworker, it was finally time to go.

Thank God. There are just some things you don’t want your bosses to know about you, and that? That is definitely one of them.

I can’t help but cringe every time I think about it.

As well as every time I see those people in the hall.

Can I please be sick at the Christmas party this year?

Better yet, I think we should have our own Christmas party?

Apparently I’m lots of fun.

(ha ha)

So tomorrow I’m headed to Colorado for a quick overnight trip. I think it was snowing up there earlier last week, but thankfully I just checked the weather and it looks like it will be pretty decent. How much would it suck to get stranded, right?

That’s my only news right now.

Crazy thought- but how about I try to post multiple times this week like a normal blogger!? Great idea.

Let’s cross our fingers that I don’t suck.

1. I have way, way more patience than I think I do.

2. A banana isn’t enough for breakfast.

3. But monkey bread someone brought in for the office is.

4. I have bad luck in San Antonio, and it looks like that streak will continue.

5. I have a really hard time liking people that work in the field of finance.

6. Did I say a really hard time? I’m sorry. I meant to say I think I may drive a stake through my eye if I have to hold another conversation with someone from finance this week.

7. When I joke about wanting Coldstone Creamery for lunch, I actually mean it. Other people don’t.

8. I suck at history homework.

9. I really like having dessert after dinner. Unfortunately, it’s something I’ve become accustomed to. I decided to wean myself off this dependency this week- which I have now 100% decided that it’s a really stupid decision. So I like chocolate. What’s the crime in that!?

10. I need to become a millionaire.

Year One: Roses, a Card, and Chocolate

Year Two: Roses and a Card

Year Three: Roses

Year Four: Card

Year Five and Seven Months: A Gigantic Box of Dunkin Donuts Chocolate Cake Donut Holes

And the clothes come off as if you had been sent a tennis bracelet.  I mean- what beats Dunkin Donuts?

It’s all about romanticism really.

<3

Boredom will make you do crazy things.

Like eat.

Or post for no good reason.

Or watch totally stupid crap on TV (Hello MTV True Life!).

Or quite possibly the worst of all-

Facebook.

I know.

How dare I speak ill of our beloved Facebook right?

Ha- don’t worry, I’m not.

Truth be told I think I’ve spent more hours on there the last month than I have my entire Facebook “career.”

Heh.

Facebook Career.

But something gets terribly skewed when you’re so.incredibly.bored and sit online for hours despite having plenty to do.

(cough- cleaning)

You start on the homepage looking at all the updates.

Then you go to your page (for the billionth time) to see who’s left you a comment.

And then you go to a few of you favorite friends’ pages and say hello, see what’s been going on etc.

And then you sit there.

Bored again.

You could clean.

Who are you kidding? You’d way rather sit in front of a computer screen than face your laundry pile.

You could go for a walk.

Eh… fresh air is overrated.

So once again you’re in front of the computer screen.

And then it happens.

You start looking at all your friend’s pages.

You begin looking at all their posts, their pictures, and their friends.

There’s no nice way to put it.

You’re facebook stalking.

The more friends you look at the crazier you get. It’s like this switch flips on and you’ve become this crazy ex girlfriend sitting outside your Facebook friend’s house waiting for them to come home from their date so you can size up the girlfriend’s car and hair and shoes.

It’s like you’ve become the creepy guy that calls your crush a million times but every time she pics up the phone and says hello you panic, chicken out, and hang up.

It’s like you’re BE FRI part of the BEST FRIENDS necklace and are watching to make sure that ST ENDS is not cheating on you.

You’re completely out of control!

Sigh…

As you can see, I’ve been way too bored the last few days. Although I don’t think I’m anywhere near the crazy ex girlfriend facebook stalker status, I must admit I’ve logged a lot of hours on that poor site. It’s like I’m studying for an MFA- and it’s not a Master of Fine Arts. It’s a Master of Facebook Activities.

Thankfully I can say I have never gotten into the whole, “So and So wants to invite you to have a drink on them! or So and So thinks you’re the 9th nicest person they know! Vote for them too!” So, I mean my Facebook activity could most definitely be far worse I suppose.

Right?

It’s like this awful drug that keeps reeling you in! You want to stop so bad. You want to stop and be a productive member of society but you’re so tempted by that high. That “one last hit” on someone’s wall…

it hurts so good.

So, I’m trying to quit.

Okay, I’m lying. I’m not trying to quit.

Although I’d be a genius if I could invent a patch for quitting Facebook.

Hmmm....

Anyway- I really need to tear myself off of the computer a little more so I can be more productive this fall.

I could take up knitting.

Or basket weaving.

Or sopapilla making.

Or maybe just learn how to spell “sopapilla.”

...

Or I could just stay on Facebook.

I could do that too.

Maybe I’ll try to quit another day. That sounds like a plan.

See you on your wall (or outside your house).

I swear I’m only kidding about the house part. I’m not a Facebook stalker.

Hey I saw that look! I’m not and you know it. Scouts honor.

<3

So there’s like a slew of things-

very important things I might add-

that we need to discuss.

Only

I’m lying and there’s really not much worth sharing.

Actually…

I could share some pretty freaking HILARIOUS text messages back and forth between myself and sister involving all sorts of random topics.

But for the sake of sparing our pride it’s best I do not share.

Then there’s the fact that we have a mouse in our garage that we’ve been trying to catch for um

like two weeks now

but that sneaky bastard keeps outsmarting us.

It’s a genius mouse.

A genius mouse!

Like the freaking Einstein Bill Gates Macgyver of all mice.

I hate that guy!

So we’ve tried everything

and yet he’s somehow managed to escape from everything we’ve planted.

Except…

this week he was no where to be found,

and the cheese we left out remained untouched.

Which freaks me the crap out because:

A. It’s inevitable some awful smell is going to start permeating the garage because by some freak chance we actually managed to kill the guy with who knows what.(And don’t you love how I just assume it’s a guy? I mean we all know it has to be! He eats and leaves without cleaning up after himself! Enough said.)

B. There’s a bigger more skilled Einstein Bill Gates Macgyver of all mice that ate the late Einstein Bill Gates Macgyver of all mice and is now going to way, way, way outsmart us.

Like we’re going to walk out to our cars one day and he’s going to be smoking a pipe reading a Sherlock Holmes novel and asking for me to bring him his slippers.

Nice.

Anyway, it’s been eerily quiet this week and I’m not sure I like that. I mean, unless of course he is in fact dead and there’s no second mouse lurking around the corner.

Then we’re good.

Then of course there’s the fact that it’s GAME DAY.

Okay

Like in one hour it’s GAME DAY.

Yes.

I still say it with excitement in my voice. Who cares if we blow this year (okay I’m totally lying. I most definitely care if we blow this year… this is simply a psychological tactic to prepare myself for any potential future disappointment), I’m excited about game day.

I’m also excited about Olive Garden’s Never Ending Pasta Bowl.

We’ll be indulging after the game tomorrow. Hello fatness! Who am I kidding? I’ll get one bowl and be done (um… I hope anyway), but it’s still more economical to do it that way.

Sure Brittny… keep telling yourself that’s why you need pasta soaked in alfredo sauce.

Ramble Ramble…

I guess I need to get off so I make sure I’m up early enough to work off a small fraction of my lunch at the gym tomorrow morning. Hope you guys had a great Friday!

When I see hilarity like this it makes me think to myself, “I might want a little mini-me one day after all.”

I crack myself up and can’t help but think my spawn would crack me up just as much, if not more.

Oh- and of course annoy, frustrate, and bring me to a slow death

(only kidding about the above, of course. Well… mostly anyway).

Anyway, what in the world do you think is going on in this picture?

A. Throwing a big fist in the air while jubilantly saying, “Yessss! Cookie Time! But wait! What am I going to do with my red balloon? I know! I’ll stick it down my pants! Great place holder.”

B. Throwing a big fist in the air while jubilantly saying, “Yessss! Cookie Time! Good thing I’m only two! If I were 26 and lived in Oklahoma and ate dozens of these every day while blogging and complaining to my blog friends about fatness my stomach would look like this red balloon here tucked away in my pants!”

C. Throwing a big fist in the air while jubilantly saying, “Yessss! Cookie Time! Let’s pretend like I’ve got a baby in my belly so I can pretend I need to feed her too!”

D. I have no idea. You should seek therapy.

E. Please feel free to insert your own observation here.

"It looks like you got a good workout,” the gentleman said to me as he exited the cash advance store and I walked out of the gym.

As I felt sweat drops trickle down my back and hit the pavement I let out a little laugh, “Yeah. I guess I did… I’m glad it’s over!”

He smiled.

As I got into my car and he got into his old red truck he looked at the younger man in the passenger’s seat, maybe his son, and sighed and said, “Well, it looks like we’re okay for a few more weeks.”

And then they drove off.

I don’t know why the whole brief moment grabbed hold of my heart today. I watch the news. I know the economy is awful. I know people are hurting. I know people are losing their jobs. I know people are losing their houses. I know all that, but for some reason that man’s tired eyes and worry to provide for his family struck me hard today.

I sat in my car and let the air hit my face for a few seconds as I thought about that man- and every other person right now in the same situation- and felt humbled.

So often my mind is so centered on what’s coming for me next. The next purchase for our house, the next trip we can save up for, “things” I want. I don’t think it’s all bad to think about those things, and I’m not consumed by them, but I must admit I have the case of “the gimmes” much more than I probably should.

As I sat there in my car I was reminded of how blessed, how truly blessed Will and I are. We have what we need, and God has truly blessed us. It’s so easy to think about “more” and the newest thing and what’s bigger and better than what you have, but this morning I remembered how good I have it. How good God is to us and how thankful I am for all He has done for me.

Times are tough, and like most everyone else we’ve been affected by the economy, but as I pulled out and drove home I began counting my blessings. Thanking God for the provisions he has made for me.

I have no idea what the future holds for my small Oklahoma life, but I know that today the Lord spoke to my heart today and refocused me on the bigger picture- which can be easy to lose sight of.

Off to enjoy the day. 80% chance of rain in OKC. The game should be a BLAST tonight.

Can you sense my sarcasm?

<3

I <3 Chicago.

I already knew that because I've been there before, however this past weekend reaffirmed it once again.

I had the most amazing weekend with my mom and sister, and it's something I'll treasure for a long time to come. Especially since I have no idea when all three of us will be together again all as once.

I flew to Chicago Thursday night and was greeted by my parents and sister. We had a late dinner at Gino's Pizza- which was amazing. Nothing welcomes you to Chicago quite like a deep dish pizza blanketed in layers of cheese at 9:00 at night.

Friday morning my dad took off for a short trip with his brother for a guys weekend in Indianapolis, so it was just us girls left on our own to shop and have a wonderful time.

Saturday morning we started off at Panera Bread followed by shopping, shopping, and more shopping. I haven't been shopping in AGES. Will and I are on the Dave Ramsey plan and we've got that "gazelle intensity" to get out of debt and make sacrifices other places. Anyway, it was so.much.fun. to buy new clothes. My mom is the best. So we did that all day Saturday- followed by The Cheesecake Factory for dinner. It was a great day- and I was actually a tiny bit sore from all that walking. I don't think that's good! What does that say about my gym workout?! Perhaps I need to change up my routine?

Sunday was a lot of fun. My sister stayed the night in her apartment the night before so my mom and I got an early start on all the Labor Day sales followed by a trip to the Shed's Aquarium.

Along with the entire state of Illinois.

It was insane.

A zoo.

An insane zoo aquarium.

It was still fun. This was my second time to go. I went with my dad the first time so it's cool that I got to go with my mom this time. After Shed's my sister met up with us and we had some coffee and had a relaxing afternoon followed by-

The Blue Man Group that night!

It was such a fun show and I'm so glad we went. Guys, my mom was freaking cracking us up so much. I don't think I've heard her cackle or laugh so hard she cried as much as I did that night. It was classic and I simply can't do it justice in this blog post. The funniest part was at the end. There's this whole "thing" with strobe lights and loud music and toilet paper being pulled from holders all over the auditorium. My mom kept yelling at me and P to "Pull! Pull! Pull!" while she was laughing so hard tears were streaming down her face and while the strobes were going and the music was pumping. P just looked at me and yelled, "I feel like we're at a rave with our mom!" Too funny.

Anyway, that was lots of fun.

After the show we went for a late steak- which is where I caught the end of the OU game.

And saw all I really needed to see.

I called Will immediately after (who was down in Dallas to watch the loss) and told him that perhaps this was good. Perhaps it's good that we are disappointed at the start of the season instead of the end like always.

He didn't agree.

Yesterday was spent doing more shopping. This time for P's room. Groceries, stuff for school, etc. It was fun. I love her place and I can't seem to wrap my head around the fact that she's all grown up and in this giant city living this adult life. It makes me look at myself and realize how old I've gotten as well and how surreal it seems. I still remember being in 5th grade and having her barf on my hair while we were visiting my grandparents in Iowa. Good times.

She's come a long way from those days. She's a woman in the city. Remember this post? Its sort of the same, only with her now. She’s back in America, all grown up, and experiencing this whole new life for the first time and I’m glad I get to be a small part of it.

So that was Sunday. Oh- and we also had a ridiculous amount of food. We at at the Five Guys burger joint, followed by dessert at the Ghiradelli place (um or however you spell it) and, well, I think the list goes on from there.

It was around the time I finished my dessert that afternoon that I started to feel a little bummed.

Which is what I promised Will I wouldn’t do. He knows me so well. He made me promise not to get bummed out early and to enjoy every minute of my time with my mom and sister until the end. So- I tried to do that.

P and I walked around and she took me to “The Bean” (not the official name, but the one I’m pretty sure most people know it by). It was a nice walk, perfect weather, and really nice. Definitely a walk I appreciated and will tuck away in my little pocket of memories I want to keep forever (whatever that means...).

We had a quiet night in and watched TV and just hung out, which was nice. It’s those little things of doing “nothing” that you can sometimes miss the most when you’re away from your family.

Today came early and it was sad to say goodbye. I hope we’re all able to see each other soon, and I hate that we’re all so far away now. I guess that’s normal though, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it, right?

So here I am, back in Oklahoma (um, which is a far cry from Chicago, right?). It’s been a typical evening, followed by a typical (thankfully short) week, followed by a typical weekend.

It was nice to step out of the mundaneness for a while. I’m thankful for my trip.

And I’m also thankful for the Chicago pizza which will be arriving to my door Wednesday afternoon.

I’m off to watch TV with Will.

Happy Labor Day!