”...Please don’t tell me to leave you and return home! I will go where you go, I will live where you live; your people will be my people, your God my God. I will die where you die and be buried beside you. May the Lord punish me if we are separated, even by death!” ~Ruth 1 16-17

My Sweet Will~

As I sit down to write you this morning I face the same problem I always do: I have a million things that I want to say and they are all jumbled inside and I’m not really sure where to start! I thought I would devote my post to you today- to tell the “world” how important you are to me. I’ll give it my best and we’ll see where we end up.

Today is one of my favorite days of the year. Today 25 years ago the most special miracle happened to me. Of course, I wasn’t even a thought back then, only God knew me. He knew He was beginning the masterpiece “Will” that would take 22 years to perfect, and then He would hand him over to me to have the awesome honor of being able to love all the days of my life. Today, in 1980, your sweet mother gave birth to her beautiful baby boy, Will. What a special day for not only your family, but mine as well. I am so thankful for your awesome family and the godly way they raised you. You were such a precious child and I wish I was able to have known you way back then so I wouldn’t have missed anything and I would have been able to watch you grow and become the man I love.

God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve by giving you to me. I look at you as you just fall asleep and start to breathe deeper and think, “Thank you God for the blessing of Will.” You are far beyond what I deserve, and I know I surely got the better end of the deal.

Do you remember the first birthday I got to spend with you? It was the big 23. I got you your favorite Playstation game, and then you got your Playstation 2. If only I would have known how that game would dictate your life! I would have banned it! Ha Ha, just kidding. It was such a fun day and I felt honored that I got to celebrate July 27, because before then it was just another day with no significance.

Do you remember your first married birthday? We got the greatest news ever! We were OU season ticket holders! What a wonderful birthday present for the biggest OU fan ever. And then we got to go to dinner and have cake twice- once at your parent’s and then at mine! That was my favorite birthday thus far. I got to go home with my husband that year, no more saying goodbye at night. That was so amazing.

I know this birthday is so different than any of the others you’ve ever had. I am so glad that once again I get to be here for it. I am so blessed to get to celebrate the “quarter-century” mark with the man that still takes my breath away. It’s like that goofy Vitamin C song you like and were talking about the other day. I’m know you never pictured being married and living in Kuwait when you turned 25. Yet another one of life’s unexpected turns.

You are my family and I am yours. I am so glad that we get to spend this day, celebrating you, in a new world- both physically and emotionally. “My verses” seem to take on a whole new meaning now, don’t they? They are so literal right now, but I wouldn’t change anything at all. I know yesterday we wondered just what we were doing and if it was worth staying without me having a job. No matter what we decide, those verses still ring true. Whether staying or leaving, I am following you all the days of my life and will be content wherever that road takes us because no one could ever love me like you. It is the most amazing feeling to open the door each evening and see your sweet face as I give you a tight hug and smell the faded remnants of your cologne. No matter what door I open at night- whether here or there- I just want you to be on the other side.I don’t care where we are.

I so wanted you to have something great to open today and my heart hurts and I tear up thinking I didn’t really get you anything. I mean- I know we got your 2 cards and video game- those are super-important gifts, but I wanted you to have something to unwrap today. I know that’s more of a girl thing, but I just want to give you everything I have. That is important to me.

The greatest thing I give you today, and each day is my whole heart that is striving to be the greatest fan of your life. I am learning each day to be the wife God needs me to be and I want so badly to take care of you as good as you take care of me.

Today we add yet another day of “making memories of us,” which was totally different than I ever would have thought! When I met that beautiful “guy” at Cameron University’s PE1001 Ballroom Dancing class, I never thought making memories of us would mean living in a world that is not our own, but it is- and that is okay because we have eachother.

Here is to your 25 years plus 25 more! Today is going to be different than all others- but just as special. I love you, sweet Will.

Today- and every other day I celebrate you.

Happy Birthday.

Love, Britter

In terms of yesterday’s post: so far so good. No volcanic erruptions at the moment. Tension is still present, but I’m okay with tension. I’m not okay with ash.

I’ve started about 5 lists in my head of humerous and crazy things that I need to write in my journal and possibly my blog. Its is amazing how having large amounts of time can free your mind of tons of needless stuff and fill it with even more tons of needless stuff.

Currently I am jounraling a lenghtly list of “Rules For Living With Your Parents.” It’s pretty funny. I think after all this is over it will be much funnier and more appropriate (I haven’t been able to fully appreciate my rules since I’m still under their roof). I’ve also started a “What I Miss and Appreciate About Home” list. Maybe I’ll post that one day too.

Anyway, today is my hodge podge of some of the many scattered thoughts that run through my head. Will jokes that the scariest thing he could ever experience would be to spend a day in my mind. He is probably right. Believe it or not- too much goes on in there. I’m sure you find that hard to grasp, but I’m being serious. I think a lot of women are probably the same way. Everything has to be picked apart and analyzed. I overthing everything. I overthink breakfast. It’s yet another strange oddity I am freely exposing the the Nest World.

I truly miss the convenience of having a dishwasher. You’d think with the thousands of large kitchen appliances my parent’s have bought at the Arabian version of “Best Buy” they’d eventually just throw one in for free. Of course, then I would have major fuse issues. I think I’d take that risk. Anyway, I don’t like hand washing dishes. I’m a germaphob and never feel like I get them as clean as a real dishwasher can. However, it gives me a nice long time to sit and look out the window as I wash and wonder about the people that are outside.

I see the buses take the TCNs to work in the morning, and sometimes I watch them get off at night. I wonder what their days were like and if they miss home too- though I have to believe even the poor conditons they face here are better than where they came from. One of the guys that works with Will is from the Philipines and likes to joke that by working over here he makes more than the president of his country- and he is being totally serious! I know some of you could probably name 5 people off the top of your head that make more than our president too, but what is amazing to me about this guy is how little he makes. Its not because hes making a ton of money over here- its because of the poor conditions of where he came from. Isn’t that crazy?

What other musings to share today… ?…

I wonder about what other people that I used to hold so close to my heart- both recently and long ago- are doing at this very instant. We are such an egocentric culture that it can be difficult at times to realize that another person’s entire world is going on this very instant too. I wonder if these people are laughing right now, or if they’re working hard, or doing something great. I try to remember them and I can’t even picture some of their faces anymore. I think that just happens sometimes with people that were important during one stage of your life.

So many thoughts to process.

I also get this terrible image of Kate Bush everytime I am flipping through channels and approach VH1 International. They love this lady- and I’ve never even herad of her! She had this crazily disturbing music video called Wuthering Heights and it trips me out everytime I see it! It came out in the 70s and it is the scariest thing I’ve seen in a while. The strangest thing about the whole thing is that I’ve lived here 3 months and have seen this randomly old video 5 times. I really wanted to find a link to her video, but I couldn’t. You would all have been wigged out too. What a strange TV selection I have.

I am grateful for online radio stations. I miss my music so much! Everyone is asleep (which is the only way I can actually get on without a fight) now so I have my earphones on and am having to constantly remind myself that I can’t sing along. What a dork. Will misses his sports radio the even more I think. Its blocked at work, so he never gets to listen to it. Its not like mine- I can’t just go out and buy him The Sports Animal on cd… thankgoodness.

Better go for now. Tomorrow I am posting before the good Lord wakes, so I need my sleep

I should probably be upfront and tell you this is not the “cheeriest” of posts to brighten a Monday, but somehow through this tension and stress I’m about to talk about I think not only I will feel better, but you will too (Okay, so I’m stretching that a bit… a lot, but oh well).

Today is more of a “healthy” vent session that actually has me feeling better, so feel free to read along.

Its about to blow in this little apartment. The tension is reaching dangerous levels and I am tip toeing around waiting for Mount St. Helens just to ash the joint.

My mom came and asked me if everything was okay with her and Will. She said she didn’t know what was going on but she knew something was wrong. The temperature skyrocketed in the room. I didn’t even want to have to mess with that whole situation. I told her I didn’t want to be the one to talk about it, and she said I shouldn’t have to and that she will talk to Will- which in all honesty is probably not great at this point either. I would so just like to wait until we move out then hash all of these feelings and then have to live in this small apartment for God knows how much longer all together. Is that bad? I don’t know. I do know how my mom is though- so I think that’s the best way to deal with this mess.

Anyway, that whole situation has been the main contributing factor of my foul mood today, and I’m afraid it had spilt over from yesterday. That’s the worst thing that can happen too- to feel bad and then to fall asleep thinking tomorrow will be better only to wake up in the same mood you went to sleep with. I just wanted to wad the world up and use it as my personal punching bag. Quite an analogy huh?

I’ve had many “I just want to go into my room, shut the door, and yell “ days since I’ve been here, but today I was just in a bad mood all together and I’m not really sure why. Most of it is because of the tension of living with my parents, however there are many- no COUNTLESS, variables that could be the culprit to these feelings of “mad.“

For example, today it is my family. Yesterday, on top of my family, it was the fact that I started my non-approved, lowest dose on the market, don’t worry you SHOULD be fine birth control which I may name later. Plus, as I said yesterday, Aunt Flo had already scheduled a visit that I had previously “okayed” only to change my mind. So currently she is ferociously beating down the door with all her mentstral and hormonal anger and I’m just praying that this new stuff will fend her off. But, I can’t say I blame her. I’d be in a bad mood too. Maybe that is why I’m in a bad mood. Who am I to speculate though?

I have bad days, but its not too often when I just am not my friendly self. When this happens, its just bad. In these instances I should probably wear a sign that says something like, “ Typically cheerful person in the foulest of moods. This is a lethal combination and should be considered threatening.” I’m sure you’ve all had one of those days when all it took was the smallest of things to trigger your emotions just the wrong way. For me it was the dryer. I’ll set this up for you so you don’t think I’m totally crazy.

It literally takes an entire day to do laundry here. Their stupid washers take an hour, and then it takes (and I’m not joking) all day to dry the clothes in the dryer. It is a very frustrating process, especially with 5 people that wear clothes everyday and have lots of laundry. You set it for 130 minutes and then you have to drain the water from this bin, start it again and repeat the process twice. Anyway, the outlet situation in our apartment is deplorable. We have kitchen 4 outlets and 6 major appliances- including 2 refrigerators (the “main” one is super small so we had to get another small one), and a small deep freeze. Anyway, every so often we have fuse issues. Today we had fuse issues.

I had to reset the power stip 3 times. FInally it started sparking and smoking which had me totally freaking out. It took forever to pry the plug out of the wall and everything in the freezer was melting and our clothes were all hot and wet and just sitting there… Like I said it was one of those “small” things that just got me going today.

On top of that we had found out that we are not going to get our money from the guy that bought out house because he is still refusing to pay the deposit and if we really wanted it we would end up spending more in a lawyer than we would on the deposit. So, it goes on the market today.

And then, which is was the kicker for me for some odd reason- Will is paying a $150 cancellation fee for our cell phones that my parents are responsible for (we paid our share already) because he doesn’t want to mess with the headache of having to deal with them. Don’t ever get a family plan with your family- just get a couples plan, it will save you a huge headache! Anyway, that irked me. Once again, the “smallest things.”

Will was exhausted today for some reason. He got up late and then was able to get home early because he had this visa thing all day at work. He got home, played (any guesses?) his new game, and then took a nap from 4:30 to 7:00. I was in such a bad mood- and this is terrible- that I just wanted him to wake up because I thought, and I quote, “You have slept too long.” What a dumb thing to say. It sounds like such a mom farce. If the guy is tired, let him sleep! He had to give blood for this visa thing, so I’m sure it had something to do with it.

Anyway, I woke him up and he went out and had dinner while. The whole time I just have this terrible feeling in my stomach that any minute my parent’s bedroom door was going to open and they would want to talk- which as I said earlier, we just really need to do when we’re not under their roof.

She’s gonna blow!

So you are probably thinking, “ how dumb to let all of those little things get you in a bad mood,” and after reading over this post, I agree that you are very right. I’ll be the first to admit that during these last few days I have been focusing so much on all of this house and job and living with my parents stuff that the “little things” have just totally worn me out. Who knew you had to be mentally tough to sit in an apartment all day and live with your family! Sorry for the huge vent session- they are so annoying, aren’t they!? Who likes to hear others complain when we all have something of our own going on? I apologize. There are enough bad things going on in the world and problems like this- minor problems in the grand scheme of the world- are really silly to get worked up over, but that was me as of yesterday! I guess its okay to feel that way every now and then as long as you don’t continually sit in those feelings. Tomorrow is a new day and theres a whole new opportunity to enjoy it. I definitely owe it to myself to focus on the positive, as I have been trying to do most days- but that sure can be rough sometimes!

Will said it best as I was just huffing and puffing and complaining about our situation and why he wouldn’t just “wake up for cryin’ out loud.” (As the sole “breadwinner” plus the fact that he has had to live with the inlaws, he has had to endure a lot more of the stress than I) Despite all the mess around us he simply said, “You know what? You have a husband that loves you very much. He’s just really tired,” and then he peacefully drifted off to sleep as if we had no cares in the world.

Yet another Will Loves Sports posts.

I’m sure you are tired of the many times I talk about this topic- welcome to my world. The guy is obsessed.

Yesterday “it” came in the mail. The all new NCAA 2006 Race for the Heisman football game for playstation2. Happy Birthday to Will. He got a super nice football card- one that required a second mortgage to get (just kidding) to add to his collection and then he got “the” game in the mail- and his birthday is still a few days away!

Anyway, Will looks forward to this day (and also August when Madden ‘06 comes out) every year. He has it marked down and know exactly when it goes on sale, preorders it, and watches the mail each day to see if its come. It’d almost be cute if it didn’t consume his every waking hour. I have to admit, this game is the coolest by far though. That’s the hard part for me. I do get excited for him because I know he loves it so much and this is the closest thing to football he’ll get over here (unless you see soccer as the “real football,” and believe me, Will doesn’t). I get all excited to see the new features he’s found and I want to see everything all at once. Then once I’ve seen everything new I’m sick of it within a week because I know everything there is to know! I know its his hobby and so I just need to let him be, but he really likes when I sit and watch him and cheer him on- yes my grown husband can revert to childlike tendencies when it comes to his video games. Its like he thinks I’m actually in the stands watching “him” play out there. With this new game you can create your own player, which he did and it looks exactly like him, so now I guess I really AM watching him play. What a strange thing. And guys think we’re weird. Hmm.

So Will is the newest middle linebacker for the Oklahoma Sooners. He has his own freshman dorm room, gets fan mail, has a meter to show him how close he is to winning the Heisman… and yet I continue to wonder about the strange attatchment he has for the game. I guess its obivious- they gave him his own living quarters and a fan base for crying out loud!

EA Sports has really done it this time. (full of sarcasm) Way to go guys

had to laugh to myself today when I saw the birth control in Kuwait thing on the Nest- because that was going to be the topic of today’s post! What a Twilight Zone moment. Are you in my brain??

Well, now I have to think of something else to write about because two posts fully explaining my BC issues is enough- even for me!

Well, Sunday is the big day. The day I make the big switcharoo. I wouldn’t be as nervous except for the fact that I have decided to skip an Aunt Flo this month because Will’s birthday is next week.Okay, so how you are all saying. “My eyes have seen too much!” Sorry, I crossed the “we don’t know you very well and REALLY don’t want to hear about your birth control issues, let alone skipping aunt flos and God knows what.” I’ll stop. If you really want to play psychologist with today’s post, I am writing because of my anxiety of not only starting low dose of BC on the day I’m supposed to take my placebo pills, but also one that isn’t approved by the FDA. Yeah, that makes ya feel great.

So, now that I promised I wouldn’t stay on the birth control subject because we’ve all had our fill for the year, I will change subjects.

I am in love. I try to use the world Love carefully, because I hate saying I LOVE Taco Bueno with the same excitiment as I say I LOVE Will. It just happens that way. I know the love is different, but it just comes out with the same zeal. That’s terrible.

Anyway, I really am in LOVE, and as of this very instant it might just borderline the same excitement as a shouting acclamation of an “I LOVE WILL.”

PEANUT BUTTER FLUFF Sandwiches. Ahh, the power that eminates from these few words. Yes, they require capitilzation because they are their own entity. They are simply divine. Let me explain. Bread is a strange thing here. They sell it, but it is a little stale even when it is fresh. It comes in tiny loaves and you must use it within a day after you buy it or it gets moldy. It’s quite an interesting thing. If I knew a kid here that needed to do a science project, I would ask him to find out why their bread is the way it is.

Anyway, you just can’t get excited about plain bread as it is, let alone Kuwait bread. But then it happened. The blessed ordering guy, in charge of choosing the items that go in the military PXs put in an order for WONDER BREAD. The miracle substance of life. I never thought I would be so excited to see a plain, white, bleached flour with no nutritional value loaf of bread. The anticipation of opening a fresh loaf of WONDER BREAD- its almost overwhelming! When they get it in stock- and it only comes to one of the bases in Kuwait- so you actually have to make a trip to get it if you work elsewhere- and believe me, none of the camps are close together.

Anyway, once it hits the shelves it’s gone within the hour. People would give their children’s college funds for a bag. You have to be at the right place at the right time. Luckily, my mom was. She threw her elbows around and fought for the last 2 loaves and got ‘em. I never realized how much I liked slice bread until I couldn’t have it. I missed it so much I could have actually just eaten the “real bread” plain- but it’s like a forbidden rule to “waste” “THE” bread in our house. You’d think we had a stash of truffles around instead of plain white bread.

the one true satisfaction of having the rare and much sought after WONDER BREAD in our house is having the best additions to go with it. PEANUT BUTTER and MARSHMALLOW FLUFF. Just let me take a moment to write that again- PEANUT BUTTER and MARSHMALLOW FLUFF, and yes, I do find it annoyingly necessary to capitalize the words. It just sounds so sinfully terrible! How much more fattening and wonderful can you get?! I figure this bread only comes around here once in a lifetime, so I should at least get the full satisfaction from it. So, I have been consuming my “fluffer-nutter” sandwiches like it was the absolute last time I would ever have one again. I’m really relishing this WONDER BREAD moment. Yes, I am a goof- but I am currently blinded by love.
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I was going to leave you all with that today and start an entirely separate post for the following story, but I thought. “What the heck. I’m already here typing. I’ll just lump them into one big post.” The issues are totally different, and in all honesty they do deserve their own post (PEANUT BUTTER FLUFF sandwiches for crying out loud!), but I am just going to place them together anyway, despite their deserving their own post and title. Today was the most special day in our house! We had our first visitor in Kuwait!!

I wish you knew the elation that I felt today. One of Will’s friends, who is currently stationed in Iraq, contacted Will the other day to tell him he would be at Doha on his way back to the states to for the birth of his first baby! Well, he didn’t know the exact day, but we knew it would be soon. Today Will had a few missed calls on his phone and a few emails from Parker saying he was already here. Luckily he got a hold of Will and Will went up to Doha to hang out with him. He was really excited.

Well, about an hour after he had gotten to Doha, Will calls and says, “Can I bring a visitor home for a few hours?” I have never been more happy to clean house for a guest than today. We have never and will probably never again have a visitor, so it was a big deal. I rushed around and got ready and closed out bedroom door- which is off limits because we are living out of suitcases and everything is a mess.

Well, Will brings Parker over and the first thing he does is takes he stuff into our room! Grrr. Oh well. I needed a few Get Well cards on the dresser, like Crystal talked about in a post the other day.

So, Parker got a shower and we just hung out at the apartment for an hour and then decided to take him out to eat.Of course, we went to Buffalos. I think I might get sick of that place!

It was so much fun. Will knew Parker from teaching youth sunday school together at the church Will grew up at, so although I know Parker, I don’t know him that well. It was still so nice for Will and I to get out with another “person” and just have a good time. He had so many stories to share, some very sad, and some of awesome hope. It was just so interesting to get to ask questions about what is going on there and what he thought of everything since he is in the middle of it every day. It was just like my 4th of July experience but so much more personal. It was just really cool to get to hear his stories and for Will to get to spend time with his friend. Parker is coming back to Doha in a few weeks, so I hope Will gets more of a chance to hang out with him and (hopefully he will get access to get off camp) show him around. It was a really fun and really surprising day!

We had a visitor!

As I sat down to write today I reazlied it was my only shot. I have to “fight” for computer time at this house, so I am at a blank. There were a million things I wanted to tell you all- I even had a funny story or two, but I’m not sure where this post is going to end up.

I got “in trouble” today by my own stupid default. I forwarded my sister something from my blog and didn’t stop to think the link was included- duh! So, once again I have somewhat been forced into the WPP. She “knows” about the “Will annoyed with my mom” issue which means that if it hasn’t already come out, its only a matter of time.

I don’t even want to go there in this post though, so moving on…

Today was so much fun. Will and I didn’t do anything extremely out of the ordinary or anything, but we just got out by ourselves and enjoyed the day- and boy did we need it!

We got the usual 6:00 in the morning phone call and of course went right back to sleep afterwards. Will’s dad’s birthday was yesterday and even though he didn’t really vocalize it, I think Will was sad that he missed it. They are really close and Will thinks that with his dad’s health there won’t be a lot more birthdays. I think it was really good for Will to get to talk to him and wish him a happy birthday this morning.

After we got up and got ready we went to Al-Kout mall to exchange my blazer. It was a little too big, so I got another size. I an so in love with it, but I have no idea what to wear with it! I looked online and there are other colors on the site, but only green at the store. hmmm. I just don’t know! I hate that and rarely every do it- buy something that doesn’t really fit into my wardrobe- but I really wanted it and I’m sure I can find a pretty cami to go with it. What color?…

Anyway, after that we headed down to Gulf Road to go to Marina Mall. I really like that mall. It is so pretty. Will wanted to see a movie this weekend. Our choices here are sort of limited and we get movies a couple weeks after they are released in the states. We had to choose between Madagascar, Fantastic Four, and some scary movie. We opted for Fantastic Four. It was good and they only cut out the kissing scene, so it wasn’t like we missed anything.

After our movie we went to Will’s favorite restaurant here in Kuwait- Buffalos. I think we like it so much because it reminds us of home.

It was just such a fun day. Like I said, nothing overly-wonderful, but it really felt like we “were eachothers” the whole day and didn’t have to compete for the living room or the kitchen, or whatever. It felt like after we had dinner we would drive home to our own apartment and just hang out on the couch watching Trading Spouses (real great TV huh?). Not the case, but it was nice to picture today.

Since I’m on that subject I thought I would answer Laura’s questions from my feedback yesterday to explain things better. I’m just going to be open and candid- so don’t think I’m being a snob or anything. I hate when people talk money when they don’t know people that great- so don’t think I’m being like that- because I’m totally not!

We definitely wouldn’t have come here if there wasn’t a goal and purpose set before us. Our goal is to stay in Kuwait for three years to pay off debt and save a good chunk of money that there would be no possible way to do in the states. Now- with me not working that has thrown a wrench in things and has altered our thinking. However- assuming I have a job soon and we decide to stay, here are some good things about staying.

When I get a job, Will and I will be able to have our own, furnished apartment totally paid, including utilities. We will be provided a car to share with someone we work with and they pay for car maitenance and gas- which is only about 86 cents- doesn’t that make you ill!?  Will gets a living allowance every two weeks that many people just live off of and don’t touch their paycheck. Will’s check is also tax free since we are living overseas, so everything you earn, you keep.

So, assuming I have a job too, that is attractive.The company pays for the employee’s way home at the end of a year, and to Frankfurt and the end of 6 months, which is also nice so we can go home and visit family.

So, once we pay off our immediate debt (and sell our house- which is huge), we are living without bills here and are able to save everything we make. The fact that I don’t have a job really hurts us because we aren’t able to meet our goals and get ahead. It is really crappy!

That is our main reason for being here. We also felt like this was the only chance in our lives that we would ever be able to do this. We had nothing holding us down, so if we were going to move, now was the time. Plus, there are opportunities to visit Dubai and other close countries that so few people think to visit on vacation! Afterall, that sure wouldn’t be my first choice!

I know I down my situation a lot, but its because I’m not here to sit all day. The main purpose for us to be here is to work, so in a lot of ways it’s been a counterproductive 2 1/2 months. Okay, so please don’t think we dictate our life around money- because when we got here we quickly learned that where we come from and what we love is so much more important that the material- but I think most couples can understand what I’m trying to say.

I know that God has us here for a reason and in this really yucky “living with my parents“ situation for a reason too, but it sure has been a trying and lonely few months! “What do you want us to do!?“ I constantly ask.

Thank you so much for all that listen to my crazy ride! I am only able to have the joy that I have because of my faith in Jesus Christ.

I really appreciated all who posted thoughtful and encouraging words yesterday. If only I could have taken you all out to get a coke or something!

Anyway, I hope you all don’t think I’m tacky for telling you all of that stuff, but that is why we are here and why we are holding on and praying that I will get a job. If not, then I’m not really sure what we are to do!

Not much of an exciting post today! Oh well. I had such a great day. Its amazing how something as simple as walking around a busy and loud mall with your husband can calm your spirit and make you realize that somehow, everything will be okay.

No bones about it. Today was bad.

I went to meet with this guy- it wasn’t an interview or anything, it was just an opportunity for him to meet me and to talk about some possibilities. Let me give you the Reader’s Digest of the meeting- which lasted about 10 minutes:

There are none.

I wanted to cry so bad right there, on the spot. I just wanted to break down! I had to do my butt squeeze technique I told another Nestie about- by the way- it totally worked.

There won’t be any positions that are a good fit for me (marketing/PR) until September or so, and there’s no guarantee that they’ll say, “Hey. I remember Brittny! Let’s call her!”

So, what do we do? Do we stay here and wait it out? Go home?  Lots of questions to ponder in the days ahead.

It was just a bad day. Then we got more bad house information dumped on us.

I want to go back home to the simplicity of oklahoma!

Sorry for my huge vent. I want to go on and on and on, but there is no good in that because I can’t change what is going on around me. I just have to look at the possibilities that are in front of me. Unfortunately that’s not looking too great.

My mom has been driving Will crazy- and I think she know this. He’s been trying to avoid her as much as he can- which is rather difficult in a small apartment. Anyway, she knew something was up. I think she thought I was upset for some reason and not Will, so she ended up coming home with this beautiful green velvet blazer from Zara that I had been eyeing but couldn’t affford. Okay, so that’s not the best way to communicate “I know you’re upset, can we talk about it?” but after my bad day, it really cheered me up and I could have cared less. I’m such a sucker. I totally took the bait.

There are about 5 other things I want to write about regarding my horrible, awful, no good, very bad day… but I actually have a funny story that happened today- and I really am trying to stay positive so I’ll quit my crying around on this post and tell you about the laugh I got instead.

So today Will and I got home and were just lying on the bed and holding eachother. I was totally enjoying the moment. I needed it.

My mom and sister decided to go to this store up the road, and my dad was still at work. I’ll fess up. I was totally thinking, “Alone with my hot husband at last.“

He shot up from the bed and asked, “Are they gone?“ just like a teenager that is about to get into trouble with his girlfriend as soon as they leave (since we’ve been living with my parents, thats how I feel sometimes!)

I got a little devilish smile thinking, “Wow, he’s really anxious.“

I told him I thought so, and he said he would go check. He goes out and checks. “Finally!“

So I’m really looking forward to alone time with Will, and as I’m getting ready for him to come back in the room, I see him walk right by and go to the back.

What is he doing?

I wait.

Still nothing.

Finally he comes back with this yummy ice cream cone he had bought that afternoon and didn’t want anyone to steal!!!!!

I just totally laughed to myself. Wow. Talk about being replaced.

So, I had this George Kastanza (or however you spell it) moment from Seinfeld when he wanted to eat more than he wanted to make love.

We had two very different thoughts racing through our minds as we heard the door close I guess!

It was pretty funny and we had a good laugh, which I definitely needed after my long day.

Well, I am actually alone with Will again for a little while longer so I am going to seize this moment and enjoy being with him.

Have a good day and thanks for letting me vent.

Does any woman actually like to sweat?

I haven’t found one yet. The old addage, “Horses sweat, men perspire, and ladies glow” crap is such a farce. I don’t glow. I certainly don’t “perspire.” I am a “sweater,” and believe me, although its not a great thing to be- I could be worse!

My sister makes me ill. We go to the gym and her pretty face gets all flushed and red, but very rarely does she sweat. My dad had the same problem when he was younger- it just wouldn’t happen! Meanwhile, I am wiping the huge drips off of my face and I just walk to the car! I wouldn’t be surprised if a doctor ever approached me as I’m sweating everywhere and said, “Ma’am, I think you may be suffering from hyperhydrosis.” That sure wouldn’t be the shock of the year. Thank God for Certain Dri.

Anyway, it is miserable here and I hear it is only going to get worse. Will’s car temp reader thing has consistenly said 50 degrees celsius for the last week For those of you who are like me and celsius means absolutely nothing, that means it is 122 F! Even the nationals call this place the oven.

The last few days have been by far the worst and I’m told it will continue until September. The humidity has been rampant! I walked outside yesterday and I felt like I had gone swimming!

There was like this muggy haze outside and out windows were full of condensation and Will’s sungalsses were fogging up. It was gross. I had to go to the bakery and was totally embarrassed because I was sweating profusely as soon as I walked outside! I felt like I had just jumped in a pool with all of my clothes on and ran around for an hour and decided now that I was all hot and gross that I would go buy bread! It was terrible. My hair was matted to my face… 5minutes ladies! And I had that disgusting upper lip sweat that really makes me want to throw up when I see it on other people. It was terrible.

For fun I just opened the window and stuck my glasses outside and at 8:00 at night they still got foggy and the windows got all wet. It geels like this huge earth sized dog is just breathing all over your face. I will take my dry heat any day over this misery. At least you have a good 5 minutes before you start sweating when theres 0 humidity! It just smells humid out. Mmmm

This will make you chuckle a little- or at least I found it a little humerous. Kuwaiti law states that if the temperature reaches 50 all outside work must cease. Well, these people realize that time is money so they will never ever report when the temperature reaches 50 or above. It could be 55 and it will still be 49 “officially.” Why don’t they just change their rules??

This heat plus humidity is terrible and is really dangerous for the people that do work outside everyday!

So today, we went to the gym and as usual I’m raining all over myself and my sister is simply “glowing.” They are really cheap at our complex and they don’t turn the air down on the ground level so it was almost 90 in the gym- plus the humidity! I was working out next to this older lady and she was riding the crap out of this elliptical trainer. Hery eyes were closed and she looked very determined. I have no sense of balance, so how in the world this lady was able to run like an Olympian with her eyes closed is beyond me. She was going so fast and so hard that I thought she was going to take it off of its spinners and fly away. I wanted to laugh so bad, but obviously I refrained. She got faster and faster and faster I thought she was really about to break the thing and then all of a sudden she just gets off. No cool down or walking around afterwards or anything. The lady was near death and she just hops right down, takes a swig of water and skips on out of there. I was waiting for to collapse, leaving me to try and remember everything from my college blow off first aid class. Seriously, as she was going to town on that elliptical I was thinking, “Okay- she really does not look well. If she falls, doo I elevate the legs and call for help? Cold compress?...” All I could remember were the 3 Cs of an emergency: check ,call, care (can you believe this is a college class!!?). What a failure. It was less than a year ago and that was all that came to me.

My shirt was soaked afterwards. Working out in the “swimming pool” was not the plan for today.

Ladies, I think I’ve officially got myself in over my head with Will.

Will loves sports. I’ve said it a million times in this blog. He loves every kind and has a million sites he must visit everyday to keep up on what is going on. Its more of an addiction than a hobby. Well, here comes August again, the month I have started to dread. Fantasy Draft. Here we go. I’m “single“ until the Super Bowl- but then basketball starts so its kind of a year round thing.

The movie Fever Pitch is a good way to equivilate Will’s love for OU and NFL football. He loves these two things like Jimmy Fallon loves the Red Sox.  I enjoy watching games with him, but his fantasy stuff is a whole different world with strange words and points and the longest draft of your life.

Will is in a keeper league, which means he can stay in the same league with the same guys as long as he wants. This is his second year in this one. He also joined another keeper league with higher stakes and better prizes. That’s TWO. And because he is in two leagues, the site gave him one free… that’s right girls. Three leagues for sure, and hes considering a fourth.

What’s a wife to do? I decided I didn’t want to become a sports widow again so I mentioned that it might be fun for us to do one of his leagues together, as a team. At first he was leery and not too excited because he figured I wouldn’t take it seriously. I told him I would and now I’m in trouble.

I’ll fess up. Here’s my confession. I really didn’t plan on getting overly serious about being in this league with him. I just thought it would be fun to pick names that sounded familiar and root for the guys when they played each week. Ha. Today Will brought me my very own $10 fantasy draft magazine so I could do- and I quote- “research.” There you have it.

I really figured I would just look over his shoulder with a supportive smile and say, “Will, that was a great pick!” or, “Our team is really great, huh?” as he set up the rosters for the week. I was looking more for an encouraging, show up for game day role. He is not.

He was actually pretty excited that I wanted to do this with him, which got me excited because I know how much this stuff means to him. I have absolutely no idea what to do with this magazine and I have no idea how to break down and compare stats, but by golly I’m going to try!

I even tried to get Will to change our team’s name to the Storming Soonerettes (goofy, I know), but he didn’t want to go that far- afterall he is playing with the guys . We wouldn’t want them to know that a GIRL is helping her husband in a league, right?

So, this is quite a challenge I’m taking under and i’m not sure how I’m going to hang, but what a trip it will be.

Okay, I can’t believe I’m about to post this for you all to read. As I’m typing I’m shaking my head with this nervous smile thinking, “What are you doing you complete crazy lady!? Do you know they put people away for talking publicly about these things?”

Why do I feel the need to share an intimate moment with you girls?

Really… why do I?…

I don’t know. On with the show.

Last night my friend and I were driving home and talking about how important it is to keep things hot in marriage.. We were talking about how stressful things are here and how with the long hours we, as well as our husbands, go straight to bed on most weeknights. Anyway, the wheels got rolling in my crazy brain and I thought, “I’m going to give Will a major shock.”

I got home and did my normal stuff and then decided to get totally dolled up in one of my sexy outfits. I went all out, stockings and all. I put my normal comfy clothes over it so he wouldn’t know a thing until just the right time. I made sure everything was perfect for his homecoming, and then waited for him to come home. He got home and I could tell it had been one of those days. His eyes were all saggy and black. I enthusiastically greeted him but was reciprocated with a sad, “I had a bad day today Britter.”

I followed him into the bedroom while he was taking off his shoes and thought I would cheer him up by pulling out all the stops. I know the surprise made him happy, but he just let out a, Will you hold me baby?”

What the….?

Hold you?

You do know what I had planned, right?

Do I need to sign it or spell it out?

What are you, hormonal and PMSing?

You can’t use that line! It is a patented for women use only!

Hold me??

What in the world was that about? I was totally thrown off guard. I think men are on to us girls, they’re using their lines when they have a bad day. I didn’t know what to think. There I was standing in my little outfit, totally shot down.

My pride took a little jab, but I could see in my eyes Will was hurting. Instead of the impromptu night I had planned we opted to share a shower and talk about our days. Not exactly what I had in mind, but I think Will felt better getting everything off his chest. And by the way… I held him last night.

I told my friend my story this morning and we had a good laugh at how our husbands can totally throw us off guard with stuff like that and say the most feminie phrase and leaving us to wonder, “Where did THAT come from?”

Then we were rolling about married couple showers. When you first get married showers are almost always going to lead to something sexual no matter what. She had me laughing as she explained:

“After a couple of years of marriage and a kid, joint showers become just as efficient as one by yourself. The sole focus is to get clean and get out. The conversation consists of ,’Can you pass me the shampoo?’ When you’re newlyweds your husband always lets you have the water stream because he knows you are cold, but now it’s like, ‘ Get outta the way! You’re hogging the water!’

She was too funny. I can’t do it justice. It has been nice having “Ethel” to talk to about stuff. She has been married for 4 years so she can relate to some of the “newlywed” stuff I experience because not long ago, she was there too.

Anyway, tonight is my Will’s Friday. I’m envious. I always get a little jealous when I am rolling out of bed at 3:45 and he is snoring. Is it bad to want to innocently drop large objects on our tile floor so he can share in the joy of morning with me? Ha ha, I’m just kidding.

I always get a little bounce in my step on Tuesday nights because I know my “Friday” is coming up, it’s also my 8 hour day, so that is a double bonus. PLUS tomorrow is living allowance day which means we’ll have Kuwait Dinar in our pocket (only to have it totally blown on a quad-ban phone so we can use it everywhere… men and their gadgets).

So, that’s my story. Nothing too spectacular, but it was still a little humorous to hear my husband turn down a night of passion to be cuddled with. I guess that’s why he keeps me on my toes!

***

Be optimistic,

dontcha be a grumpy,

when the road gets bumpy,

just smile

smile

smile!

<3 have a good day